12 Weeks Pregnant
Yay! We have made it to 12 weeks!!! This is the best Valentine’s Day gift ever! (I still consider each moment with my baby a gift!) I’m not going to lie, we’ve been holding our breath the whole time. I became very passionate about announcing our pregnancy early, (we announced before the standard 2cd trimester and I explained why here.) but just as excited as we were to announce we have a sweet miracle on the way, we were equally just as scared. I didn’t want to admit it, but of course I worried (and still do) about the “what if’s.”
My husband and I chose to actively push those worries and fears aside to CELEBRATE and LOVE on our baby instead. You’d be surprised at how difficult it can be to celebrate and bond with your baby when every moment you’re fretting over losing him/her.
When We Found Out We’re Pregnant With Our Rainbow Baby
Every month we tried every trick in the book to increase our chances of getting pregnant…
- I used every app in the app store for ovulation predictions (Glow was my fav!)
- I peed on fertility sticks almost daily until I got the positive sign that I’m ovulating
- This is way TMI, but we would have sex almost daily just to make sure we didn’t miss that moment
- Again TMI – but after sex Doug would hold my legs up – we made sure gravity was always in our favor 😉
- After months of not getting pregnant, I began the whole 30 cleanse (and completed it) just in case nutrition was a factor
After doing everything possible to increase our chances of becoming pregnant I’d take an obnoxious amount of early pregnancy tests. I was just so eager. But, month after month they all told me I still wasn’t pregnant.
After months of peeing on sticks, in mid December one test showed a faint line.
I showed my sister the test and she was the first to tell me that you had to look SUPER close to see the positive line. My mother in law agreed. They both said that I was looking for the line and that it was barely there.
But it was there – even if only a little. I googled what it meant if a faint line appeared and trusty google told me that it means I am likely pregnant but VERY early.
I took another test the next day and there was no line. I was partially bummed, but I also knew that there was still a chance I could be pregnant. So I decided to be patient and give it a couple more days.
On December 19th I didn’t get my period. Overly joyed I felt like I just “knew.” Usually I’d buy the cheap store brand pregnancy tests or the test that is on sale (these things can be expensive!) but because I had a good feeling I thought it’d be smart to take one of the new pregnancy tests that is digital so it tells you “pregnant” or “not pregnant.”
There can’t be any faint lines and confusion there, right?
You have to make sure you pee on this stick correctly! Apparently I didn’t because the test showed a error sign. Ugh! Such a bummer! The only thing that made me happy was the good ol’ saying “No news is good news!”
The next day – December 20th – I took the other digital pregnancy test that came in the box and this time I made sure to pee on it the right way! When it revealed the results tears filled my eyes and ran down my face! It said “PREGNANT!”
This news couldn’t have come on a better day. I was due to have our sweet first born son, Johnathan, on December 20th. The feeling of mourning our loss and being excited for this new miracle was all consuming. As I sat there on the toilet staring at a plastic device I had just peed on I whispered up to our little Johnny. I told him how much I love him and will always love him…and I thanked him for this sweet, sweet gift he gave us.
Because I ended up finding out we’re pregnant on Johnny’s due date I took it as a sign from our sweet boy in heaven. It was like this pregnancy was a gift from big brother and a message to mommy and daddy to be happy for the holidays.
Revealing We Are Pregnant To My Husband
Let me back up for a minute and give you a bit more of the background behind all of this.
On December 20th, I was heading into New York City to work on my jewelry line. So when I sat on a toilet looking at that positive pregnancy test it was a toilet in Port Authority Bus Station’s bathroom…not exactly where I’d wanna be to find out the best news of my life. But then again, I had been taking tests in the most random places anyway. My g0-to was usually the gym bathroom. I had to stop taking these tests at home.
Each month my husband would see all the negative tests in the bathroom garbage. I probably took 5 (or more) tests each month thinking just maybe it had been too “early” and that’s why the previous one read negative. I was always hopeful I may be pregnant – until my dreaded monthly came. When my period came it brought along with it a loud and obnoxious announcement: “No, you aren’t pregnant! Stop taking pregnancy tests!”
Doug told tell me to stop taking so many tests. I was kinda ridiculous. He really hated seeing all the negative tests in the bathroom and I think he hated my mopey mood after each test was negative. So, I did what any determined momma does — I began hiding the tests I’d take. Out of sight, out of mind for my hubby (and I’d still get to know ASAP if I am pregnant!). 🙂
Planning The Big Pregnancy Reveal To My Hubby
I sat in port authority bus station crying. I managed to get out of the bathroom and sit on a bench on the side of the huge room. People would whiz past me running to their destination, some would line up in front of me waiting for their bus, a few looked over at me with a “Is that girl crying?” on their face. I didn’t care.
Tears would just fall and fall. My nose was a non-stop faucet. The ugliest cry you’ve ever seen in public. But I really just did not care. I was happy. I was sad. I felt for my baby in heaven, but at the very same time I was so excited for the new blessing in my belly.
How would I tell Daddy we are pregnant again? I had dreamed of telling him in the most awesome, spectacular way – but now that it was here I felt like I had no time to prepare. The first time I told Doug we were pregnant I had three – literally three! – surprises lined up for him. It took me two whole days to keep it from him in order to get all of these surprises ready. There was no way I could do that this time. I wanted to tell him IMMEDIATELY! But I had to work all day in the city so that left me with very little time to plan.
Our Rainbow Baby Is A Gift From Our Angel Baby
I don’t really believe in coincidences. I believe everything happens for a reason. The fact that every test read negative and the test the day before had defaulted made me believe that we were meant to find out about our rainbow baby on my sweet angel baby’s due date. Call me looney, but I believe this rainbow baby is a gift to his mommy and daddy from their angel baby, Johnathan. 🙂
The whole day I was in the city my mind was with this little one and his/her big brother in heaven. I couldn’t wait to get home and tell Daddy about our rainbow baby. I began brainstorming different ways to share the news.
Revealing You’re Pregnant
There are a lot of cute and clever ways to reveal you’re pregnant to your husband:
- You can buy the book Dude, You’re Gonna Be A Dad. This was one of the three surprises I had for Doug the first time.
- Reveal to your baby Daddy you’re expecting by surprising him with a gift of baby bibs! This is another way I surprised my hubby the first time. (I love these new bandana bibs!)
- You can surprise the new daddy with a box that has a piece of fruit the size of your baby. (For example, if you’re 7 weeks pregnant then your baby is this size of a blueberry.) You can put one blueberry in a box and ask your hubby open it. It’ll be a fun guessing game until he finally figures out what a little blueberry means! 🙂
Revealing I’m Pregnant To My Hubby
I love all of these ideas! I actually used two of three revealing our first pregnancy to my hubby. This time around I had less time and it was a bit different. This time around I found out I was pregnant with my rainbow baby the day my angel baby was due. It was a terrible morning to wake up and know that today was the day my baby in heaven was due. I knew Doug was taking it rough too. I wanted to brighten the day for Doug by sharing the news immediately.
Doug and I had just taken some professional photos with my in laws for Christmas. With it being 5 days before Christmas I thought it’d be cute to stick a “Merry Christmas” picture of us along with a note from our rainbow baby and give Doug an “early Christmas gift.” The note said this:
My big brother, Johnny, told me today was the day he was due to be with you and mommy. He wasn’t able to be here so he sent me instead.
He doesn’t want you to be sad during the holidays without him; instead be happy because he gave me to you! I can’t wait to meet you in August!
Watching Doug open this and read this note brought so many feelings. Of course I cried – again! It was just such a bittersweet – but mostly sweet – moment.
Sharing Our News With You
We had a bit more time to plan a clever and cute way to reveal our pregnancy to our frans! We shared on our show #MarriedLife. If you didn’t get a chance to see, I’ve added the videos below. The second part shows the moment I told Doug that we are expecting. He had no idea I was even filming. (I used my iPhone.) That being said, it’s kinda crummy quality – but it’s my favorite video ever! 🙂
Surprise! Pregnancy Announcement Part 1:
Pregnancy Announcement Part 2 (and the moment I revealed to Doug we are pregnant):
What does it take to be a good wife? God knows I had some trouble figuring that out. My past threatened my future, but I learned how to stop that from happening. If you’re struggling in the dating world — or if you’re engaged, a newlywed, a long time married veteran, you will feel a lot better about your relationship after reading about mine in my new book, Wifey 101: Everything I Got Wrong After Meeting Mr. Right!
It’s on sale for less than $10 bucks on Amazon, B&N, and everywhere books are sold. Grab your copy NOW! *Online only. (If you’d like to read chapter one for FREE just click here.)
***Now Offering Autographed Copies. Click Here To Get Yours!***
*Some or all links in this post may be affiliate links. Affiliate links are a great way to keep my blogs alive. Thank you for your support!*