I’m keeping this Married At First Sight recap short and sweet. It’s as easy as this: Yes, marriage is hard work. No, it shouldn’t always feel like work. True love takes time – it doesn’t happen over night. Or in the three weeks you’ve married a complete stranger. Sorry, I just can’t buy into that.
Yep, It’s been nearly three weeks at this point in the experiment and we’ve seen a whole lot of struggle. There has been so much struggle I can barely smile watching the show sometimes. It is really heart breaking. I think there are opportunities that are missed and adventures that aren’t being explored all because of FEAR. Patience is being tested and nerves are on edge.
That couldn’t be more true for Ashley Doherty and David Norton. Ashley seems to be terrified of everything having do to with opening up and letting her guards down for her Married At First Sight hubs. Many peg her as “icy” and “cold” but her actions aren’t as alarming and “heartless” as you may think. Right or wrong, she is just trying to protect herself. To be honest, it’s kind of understandable. She just dove head first into a whole new family, home, and MARRIAGE. It’s only been 3 weeks, people! This is just a tv show for us, but for them it is the real world and their real life.
If nothing else, I completely respect Ashley for being true to herself and not just saying anything that would make herself look good on TV. Y’all should give her more credit for that. Should she let her guards down more? Yeah, probably. She should have at least given Dr. Logan’s fish bowl a chance? Yeah, that would’ve shown some effort. Should she have at least let him peck her lips when he went in for their first kiss? Well, maybe. If she doesn’t do something to open up a bit they’re definitely never going to work. But her actions and words to him aren’t nearly as alarming as this: David claiming to be falling in love with her. That is the one thing that caught me way off-guard. David said, and I quote: “I feel like I’m falling in love with Ashley. There’s times that I don’t think I like her. But there’s times where I know I’m falling in love with her.”
I just can’t comprehend that. She couldn’t be more clear about how she feels about him. And, I hate to be the one to just boldly, flat out say it – but you guys know to expect that from me anyway, right? – SO, here it goes: There’s no chance in H#!! Ashley is even remotely close to falling for David. She seems to be completely turned off by even being around him – forget letting him touch or kiss her. How could he fall in love with someone who distances herself from him every chance she gets? There’s something I just don’t get.
That being said, I wonder if she is kind of onto something that we as the viewers aren’t catching. It’s so sweet how David is so lovey dovey and mushy gushy towards her NO MATTER WHAT SHE DOES. But, let’s be honest, is that real? To go so far as to say that you think you’re in love sounds kind of cray cray to me.
There I said it. It’s what you’re all thinking anyway! Don’t get me wrong, I really like David. I actually really like all of these couples, but that just strikes me as so strange.
The L-O-V-E word is brought up, again
Moving onto Mr. Tres Russell and Vanessa Nelson. These two love birds are ridiculously adorable. When they have their little bickering it’s just all sorts of sweet and cute. And I love how Vanessa admits that she may fart in her sleep. She’s right – we all do. It’s whatevs.
Tres says that he thinks he may be falling for Vanessa. This is something I can get behind. First of all, you can see the chemistry in these two. Secondly, he says he thinks he could be falling for her. To me, this is just a bit more believable. I think David is just a little ahead of himself…maybe in love with the idea of being in love? (And that’d scare the effin daylights out of me if I were Ashley – my hubs knew to keep that L word hidden until we actually were definitely in love – 6 months later!)
BEST NEWS EVER
Sam Role and Neil Bowlus are doing swell!!! This relationship is reminding me more and more of Doug and my relationship. So it wasn’t butterflies and rainbows in the beginning, but they’re open to change and communicating. Also, these two show that they definitely listen to the experts and their advice – speaking of – how amazing is Dr. Logan’s fishbowl?! That game should be wrapped up in a box and made available to every couple in the world! (Dr. Logan – let me know when you have this. I will be the first to buy it!)
Sam is MAYBE beginning to fall for her Married At First Sight Hubs. 😉 “Maybe we’ll start holding hands soon,” she said. “But let’s not get crazy.”
These two have definitely shown the most growth. By the end of this episode, Sam and Neil had conquered a pretty major issue: agreeing they’d made a mistake in their choice of home. They talked it out and both agree to move into Sam’s house for the time being. AND {Drum Roll Please} if I’m not mistaken I can see hearts glowing in Sam’s eyes: “I actually don’t think the dumb stuff [Neil] says is dumb … I think it’s funny.” Well, well, well. Someone is having a huge change of heart towards her hubs. I love watching this Married At First Sight journey unfold.
What do you guys think about two of the men saying they’re falling in love by week 3?
Married at First Sight is on FYI tonight at p.m. EST. Doug and I will be tweeting and periscoping LIVE. Leave your comments below and I will chat with you guys soon!
xx,
Jamie
Jamie Otis
91 comments
Simple response, Ashley should not have signed up with her guard up the entire time of the show. Period.
Oh and as far as Trey and Vanessa goes, of course their marriage wasn’t gonna work out, she wouldn’t let it. Sheesh, cut the guy some slack Vanessa. How long could any guy keep working at a marriage with their wife second guessing everything they do? Talk about a self-fulfilling prophecy. She was so obsessed with her fear of men being unreliable that she eventually chased him off by ignoring 99 his words or deeds that displayed commitment to harp on any 1 that could possibly hint at uncertainty.
I do believe in self-fulfilling prophecies. I really feel for woman who struggle with this. I know I was like that, too.
You make some good points, and David definitely moves waaay too fast for his own good in relationships, but as fool-hearted as he may have been to think he was falling in love with Ashley I think he was being completely real about it. Here’s the thing though, I think the way he felt had much less to do with Ashley and much more to do with how badly he wanted his marriage to work. Cray cray as that may be for him to jump in face first, isn’t that what this show is *supposed* to be all about? How much can you blame David for moving too far too fast when the relationship is an arranged marriage to someone he’s never met? The whole point of marrying the couples as opposed to just setting them up on blind dates is so there’s commitment, so they can’t just easily give up on the relationship and find any little reason to walk away. It’s ironic, and sad for the men, that that’s most of the women the experts are choosing are now treating it so much less like a marriage and so much more like a blind date.
Ashley should never have agreed to go through this process. How could she even imagine she could handle being married to a stranger when she’s got up walls so high she can’t even see over them? It’s painfully obvious that she has a very hard time opening up, and her only chance of overcoming that would’ve been to be matched with someone way out of her league looks-wise. I think a woman as plain and boring as her should’ve been thrilled to end up with a match who wasn’t ugly and was so accepting and offering such to love her so unconditionally. As fool-hearted as David may have been you have to give him credit for his wholehearted optimism, a rare quality to find to his extent. I think they were just on completely different pages expecting different things out of this. David wanted a marriage and was willing to do whatever it took to make it work. Ashley wanted a perfect hunky prince charming and wasn’t willing to settle for anything less. David was looking for any reason to keep going, whereas Ashley was looking for any excuse not to.
I think most of the women on season 3 and season 4 have been expecting that since this is a TV show the men they’d be matched with would have movie star good looks and don’t wanna settle for anything less. Which is sad, since the men have all had nothing but nice things to say about how their matches looked upon first sight at the altar, despite the fact that none of the women have movie-star looks either. Huge props to you Jamie for being the exception to this rule. You’ve done great with your husband, cause he looks much better now than he did at the wedding. I think at the wedding, no couple has seemed like more of a mismatch in terms of their looks as the two of you did, and yet you showed that by just being willing to keep your mind and heart open that attraction can develop and a marriage like this can be successful. It’s amazing how quick so many of the women on this show are to close themselves off completely. It’s mind-blowing that they are so rigidly picky and thought they wanted to be married to a man they’d never met before.
Although I think it’s ridiculous to claim to be committed enough for marriage and be willing to decide to divorce after a mere 6 weeks I think Neil deserves a pass for it, since I think Sam was treating him so badly till decision day was getting close just because she thought he was so committed that he’d stick it out anyway, which I think says a lot about the way she would’ve treated him throughout their lives.
Hey Todd. I love your insight! I know you are “supposed” to be all in when marrying a stranger, but it is SO hard when its actually YOU and you’re looking at a complete stranger who is your husband. It’s just tough. I think the key to my relationship was certainly that Doug was SO PATIENT with me … God knows I needed some time to rationalize what I had just done. lol Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I really like seeing your perspective!
Yeah I am kind of with the other posters here. Why did Ashley even want to be part of this show? It seems like someone is forcing her to do it, like with death threats or something. Every episode is hard to watch, she just looks so afraid the whole time. WHY did she think that she’d be matched up with someone perfect? Perfect isn’t out there.
I like what you say when you say “perfect isn’t out there” … ain’t that the truth.
Great column by the way! Yes, I think Ashley showed no effort what so ever, Guarding herself? A German Shepard I think, would have been more discrete than her performance on the show. But the girl signed up to get married. Protect yourself when you are in downtown Atlanta at 1 am in the morning! Signing up to marry a perfect stranger, without an open mind, was utterly ridiculous.
David & Ashley – I think that these two will make it. It is possible for David to be falling for Ashley. And I think that Ashley DOES have feelings for David and it scares her. She is his opposite on many levels and when she pushes him away, it’s to see how far he’s willing to be pushed and fight back for her. It’s stupid, but it’s what us women do, especially those of us who have been hurt. David is unbelievably patient and if he didn’t have deep feelings for her, he wouldn’t put up with her rejection. I truly think they will make it. They have good stock, good hearts, and the right intentions.
Neil & Sam – They are my favorite couple. Neil is the perfect companion for Sam, the right balance that she needs. He is her constant, her steady force that will give her life stability and strength. And she is his passion, his fire, his little ball of sparkly glitter. They just fit, in all the right ways, even the way they argue. It’s all wrong, but it’s all right. At the end of the day, they’ll find each other, and love will be there guiding them. They will last forever.
Trey & Vanessa – I think they will fizzle out. Trey is ready for the long-haul, but Vanessa’s “trust” issues are going to ruin their relationship. She second guesses him all the time, and Trey isn’t going to keep putting up with that. He is committed to her and is trying to prove that, but her attitude is disheartening to him. You can see it on his face. I believe he wants to love her, be in love, and live happily ever after, however, she is making him question that. Guys like Trey need a strong, confident woman that will stand by him and support him.
Here’s what people don’t get about marriage. It’s a DECISION, not a whirl. And love is an ACTION, not a feeling.
Preach it!!!
xx
So David is “cray” for saying he thinks he loves his wife after 3 weeks but it’s ok for you to tell your husband on tv that you still have feelings for your ex? Come on…. Ease up on the guy.
Tres & Vanessa – Well, you have to give each couple a little leeway due to the way the show is produced. However, Vanessa stating what she did about the girl at the party. Does no one pick up on the mean-mug that she gives the girl and how instantly a vibe is cast that she is not welcome. Then she has the audacity to say she doesn’t really feel a connection with the girl. No kidding. We all have our demons and she is entitled to her apprehensions, but she can’t cast judgment on Tres based on her previous experiences.
Neil & Sam – At least with these two you know what you’re getting. They’ve been pretty open to the process and have shared their struggles. Neil has been very resilient to her admittedly harsh comments to him. He is rolling with the punches and they seem to grow every episode. I like their quirkiness and they seem the most real. Sam needs to chill out a bit, but they are humans and to err is to be human.
David & Ashley – I was not fond of Ashley at the beginning of this, however she has communicated where she is at. She instead of vocalizing her issues internalized it and in turn was coming across as cold to David as the attraction wasn’t present and she felt trapped. The experts helped open this dialogue, and she has started to grow on me. David however is causing his own defeat, even prior to this text-message fiasco. The experts tell him he needs to be patient and let the friendship grow. Ashley was actually warming up to him on the first date and then he throws all that patience out the window and expresses his annoyance at her not kissing him (that’s hardly patient the day after he said he would be). Then, the expert suggests starting the introduction to his friends off slowly so they can build up to the big get togethers that he enjoys. She expresses continually her timid nature and shyness and how she has to build up to that large social get together. I don’t blame him for the unexpected additional out of town guests, however, I think in every way he has been very self centered. She is introverted and is trying her best to mingle into his social environment. He should have maintained close proximity at minimum checking on her to make sure she’s doing okay. I think highlighting her to his friends and making sure she is comfortable in the uncomfortable setting would have been ideal. If you listen to him describe the experience and this party he uses “I” a whole lot. This is indicative of his inability to think outside himself and his perception of how marriage should be. Ashley definitely needs to open up and make a real effort for this experiment, but what do you call what she was doing at the party?
Good luck to the couples and I realize I see the side of these people that the producers want me to see, and there is a larger picture than I am privy to. I do have to say that Vanessa’s episode 10 recap gave me a different side of her to take into consideration.
I personally believe it’s possible to fall in love in 3 weeks, if anything if I don’t feel that I’m falling in love by that point I pretty much call it quits. In this situation they are together almost 24/7 it’s like really doubling the weeks from a normal dating situation.
Wow! I feel like I’ve been one of few who are seeing Ashley and david this way. I feel like he has an underlying manipulative side, not necessarily malicious, maybe he doesn’t even see it… but it’s there. I’m so disgusted at the publics opinion of Ashley and the mean, hateful, and judgemental things they say about her. And Sam and Neil are my favorite couple too! They are very similar to my boyfriend and me. Much the same way watching you and Doug was. I L O V E Tres and Vanessa. She has many issues to overcome and needs to be more open to not being upset about Tres just being a normal person… we all have the tendency to maybe go get drunk with or family or pals a few times a year or so… I never saw what’s the big deal about a few things, but daaammmmn… if he shot the Love word down like that, I’d be hurt too. When clearly they have that and just aren’t at the admission part yet. I’m totally done watching David and Ashley right now.
I am very glad I took a look at Ashley’s Twitter (I don’t tweet but I Googled her Twitter handle), because the fact that she actually responds to tweets makes me believe she is actually human. Maybe it’s just the way the show is edited (& maybe the producers did it to acquire more ratings), but Ashley absolutely comes across as heartless, and cold. Each week.
Each week I pray (which now that I think about it it’s kinda silly I’m praying since these shows were taped a little bit ago) she shows us her human side. But much of the time, she really just seems indifferent, and it’s really tough to watch the David/Ashley segments. Like, uber painful!
I am married, and though my marriage was not arranged like theirs, the old adage “it takes two to tango” certainly rings true. & at this point (5 weeks in I think), I just don’t see Ashley trying. But again, it could be the way their segments are edited.
I’m eager to see what will happen in the end for Ashley/David. However, I won’t hold my breath that they will choose to stay married.
Sam & Neil: Sam is overbearing, and Neil is extremely passive. I see them as friends only as opposed to hubby/wife. Sam has gotten much much better though. However, not gonna hold my breath for their lifetime marriage either.
Tres & Vanessa: #TeamTreNessa of course! They are clearly the more promising couple. I like their chemistry. They remind me a lot of Cortney and her hubs (I forget his name) from S1.
Great Blog Jamie!
I have to agree with you about David. I don’t want to trash him on social media, but there is just something off about him. And I feel bad for all the hate Ashley is getting. She cannot help that she is not attracted to David. She’s not attracted to him physically OR emotionally, and IMHO I think she is put off more by his personality than his looks. Initially, you were not attracted to Doug, but his personality won you over. David and Ashely are simply not compatable — look how differently they celebrated their bachelor/bachelorette parties. David was partying it up and Ashley almost walked out of her party when strippers showed up. Not that there’s anything wrong with either way of celebrating. My point is that they are just very different people. I almost feel like, because she said she focused too much on looks in the past, that she was purposely paired with someone she would find unattractive to see if she could look past his looks. Everyone seems to feel so sorry for David, but I feel sorry for Ashley. Yes, she signed up for this, but in the case I really think the experts got it wrong.
Tres and Vanessa will make it if she learns to help him feel more trusted. I know trust is earned, but it’s also learned. If you get angry at every little thing, then the target of the anger is going to keep it under wraps – no trust can grow.
Neil and Sam are painful to watch. I just don’t get that match. I think at one point, she accused him of being one way in front of the cameras than when the cameras are off, but I think she is, too. So, I understand the comment he made that she got so livid over and threw him out of her house. He is taking his cues from her, but she gets mad when he brings it to light when she does it. Neil does need to say more of what he puts in his video diary. You have to say what you feel or Sam will never understand how he thinks.
The whole Ashley-David saga is killing me! I think Ashley needs to give David a chance. She’s using her “I take things slow” as a crutch. How can you go into this process and think it’s OK to take things slow or that your spouse would just sit back and say, “Yeah…ok…whatevs, babe”? I think David is in love with who he has perceived Ashley is – sweet, caring, cute, funny – I mean, they do have their moments.
My other thought is that all of their drama is a little staged and there’s more opening up going on than what the viewers are allowed to see. Maybe in the end they’ll turn out like you and Doug and live happily ever after – with a little work. David sure does seem patient!
First, as far as David goes…we have to remember that the producers ask them questions. The producer prob. said, “So, do you feel like ur falling in love with Ashley?” And then he said, “Sure, sometimes I do feel like I’m falling in love with Ashley.” That is def. not creepy when you think of it that way. Also Katy, you hit the nail on the head about relationships when you said, “Unlike dating, where you see each other only when you want to, and when you feel great, when you look your best, marriage is 24/7/365. It’s truly for better and for worse. There are no sick days. I want to go out to dinner as planned and hubby had a really bad day at work, and wants to order in. What do you do? How & when do you compromise. Most of the time, it shouldn’t be hard work, but know it can be.” Only couples who realize this can make it. I just got engaged and I’m already realizing this.
Jamie, my boyfriend and I watched you and Douglas’s romance grow… and seeing you work through the things you struggled with helped us as well. We both teared up when you renewed your vows on the beach. All best to you both! I especially could relate to you, because I had fallen in love with a guy years ago… mostly by internet and phone, but when I met him IP there was no chemistry. He moved across the country for me and we tried to make it work for awhile, but to no avail. We are still good friends. But in the end, I thought he deserved more. So did I. This is where I can relate to Ashley as well. What’s difficult for me to understand is that David is all kinds of attractive. Would it kill her to kiss him? And he’s going to have no problem finding someone to love him for who he is, but honestly I don’t judge her, because you cannot control this attraction thing. You can’t make it go away when you don’t want it… just as well as you can’t make it happen when you really want it to. I had to hand it to Jacqueline last season. She came all the way to bridge that gap with an open heart, and then it seemed Ryan bailed. So sad. Anyway, I think Ashley’s doing the right thing by being honest. That’s the best thing she can do.
I feel a little bad for David. I don’t really think he knows how to handle the whole situation with Ashley not being attracted to him. I honestly don’t think she knows how to handle it either (or if she’s completely giving up on trying to develop that). Tres and Vanessa are adorable! Sam and Neil are pretty painful to watch. I feel like Sam’s strong personality picks at Neil a lot and seems really demeaning. At the same time, I feel like Neil needs to stand up for himself a little bit. Honestly, she might respect that if he did since she’s always on him to “man up.” I just can’t fathom talking to anyone like she talks to Neil.
Jamie thank you for creating this blog . I was blaming Ashley as well but after reading your thoughts on it and Christa’s comments , I’ve changed my mind completely. I laughed when David got upset about missing his dad on Father’s Day but he seemed more angry then sad, it made wonder. And It made me crenze when he said he wouldn’t ALLOW her to keep making excuses to keep from talking about their relationship Really? He was so angry when she came home late from school ( she should have called) nevertheless, he was able to suppress it. There is anger and possibly some explosive behavior issues with David. Having said that, I understand his frustration to some point because holding his hand or referring to him as her husband should be expected, at least. What is he like when the cameras aren’t rolling???? Scary thought . Take your time Ashley, it’s your life.too.
Now, Vanessa and Tres, they aren’t just cute together but they have so much in common and they have a level of concern and respect for each other. They never really seemed like strangers. Tres didn’t try to move faster than she was willing to go. Didn’t consummate their marriage until in their own place and they both agreed. They handle each other tenderly and they both need that from each other. Reaching out and meshing with family and friends over a full course meal was ( culturally speaking) a real plus on Vanessa’s part. It made Tres very proud . They remind me a little of Courtney and Jason, a strong physical attraction that worked itself out into a real love connection. Jamie I adore you and Doug.
Oh. I’m from NJ and I attended Faith Fellowship Center in Sayerville where I studied Christian Counseling. Monet_MAFS is doing well. I watch her on Black Love…FYI got it right this season. Love y’all ❤️❤️❤️
100% agree about David and Ashley! I got super creeped out by him on the honeymoon when he wouldn’t shut up on the roadtrip even though she very clearly needed some space. I think he needs constant attention and affirmation, which he has received all of his life from his mother. I also see flashes of temper and anger from him that make me uneasy. I’m not saying she’s perfect, but as an introvert, I can relate to how she’s shutting down with his constant need for attention.
I’m just super icked out by him and yet everyone seems to be blaming her so I appreciate your insight.
Wow, never really thought of David saying that before until now, and that is WEIRD! And by the spoilers I have read it all fits together, but I won’t bring that up here 🙂 David is seemingly a nice guy, but I have to say I am picky myself and see little things that David does that would irritate me as well. Ashley does seem like she needs to loosen up just a bit more and at least be friends with David. She sure doesn’t seem like a wife to him, but doesn’t even act very friendly with him either.
As for Sam and Neil, I can see Sam’s frustration at Neil where he does seem a little timid to tell her exactly how he wants things…BUT Sam can dish it out but not take it back. Like when Neil said “I learned from the best.” I mean come on Sam! You have said way worse to poor ol’ Neil and he didn’t flip out on you! But she may be learning from her mistakes, we are all human.
Tre and Vanessa seem almost perfect! But I get an eerie feeling it may be too good to be true. But we will see! Tre’s past may get him in a bit of trouble.
I think your personal experience is clouding your perception on Ashley. On the wedding day she was not attracted to him and I think she made a decision she would get through the next 6 weeks. You and Jaclyn (Season 2) were not attracted to husband’s but you both tried. Ashley wouldn’t even answer 1 fishbowl question. She uses school her dog to Keep distance from David. Vanessa freaked out on honeymoon and called one of the experts. Ashley hasn’t reached out to them for help. I do agree that David is in love with idea of love. He is also very needy. I dated a guy like him and needy people need other needy people. One of the experts needs to talk to him and explain that people fall in love at different rates and when he pushes someone to move at a pace faster than what they are comfortable with then it pushes them away. He needs to pay more attention to the other persons behavior and wait until they are on same page before progressing to a more serious step in the relationship or declaring his love for that person. The guy I dated said he loved me after a week and when I didn’t say it back he kept saying it more. If the other person isn’t on same page you stop and give them time and let them initiate it when they are ready. I don’t think David realizes how his behavior comes across. Ashley on the other hand needs more serious intervention. She is not willing to step outside of her comfort zone. She isn’t as great as she thinks she is. Sam has severe mood swings. She needs to work on her communication skills as well. They seem like a cute quirky couple at times but then she creates issues. I think if they had more time to not rush everything that might help calm her down some. Tres & Vanessa are like Jason & Courtney. I think they have a shot.
Sorry, messed up my comment. I think it’s too easy for us to judge. We’re not seeing everything and of all people Jamie, you should know how much editing there is. I look at Ashley and see someone very guarded and wonder if there isn’t something else she’s unable to communicate. You were up front that you had issues, not everyone has that strength. They’re going to throttle back according to last week and then I guess we’ll see what happens. Supposedly they are having more communication this week. Like I said, there is a lot we don’t see.
I think Tres and Vanessa are cute as well, but from the look of their pages on twitter, it looks like they aren’t together that much and she barely mentions him. I hope they stayed stuck together, but I seen things flame out as quick as they flare up before.
Sam has so much heart and is easily hurt. I’ve traded tweets with her and people have been so nasty to her she had to back away. Like I told her, everybody poops and so we’re all just a bunch of poopy animals. I can’t believe the judgment that comes from peoples mouths so quickly over a half hour show that covers six weeks of life for these people. I think Neil’s ability to stand up to Sam will weigh in, but she is also learning to appreciate his cool head. She knows her tendency to get defensive and she’s trying to work on it. Like you said, they seem to really listen and try and I think the attraction factor is all for the geeky kind these days. Go Neil. LOL He’s kind of cute actually even to this 60 year old.
Anyway, I think so much judgment and prediction is a part the producers and directors go for, but it can really hit hard with these people when it gets super personal so many months after the show’s already been taped. God Bless you.
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I get a feeling when I watch David that something is a little child like and weird. I got that feeling immediately when the show starting airing previews prior to the airing of the first episode. It was a scene where David did a little cross back kick dance and touched his heels with his hands..idk it just seemed very childish and it irked me everytime I saw it. In the beginning I felt kind of bad for him. As the episodes kept airing I was thinking this girl is repulsed by him and there’s no way he’s getting passed the friend stage. He’s very child like in his ways. Watch his facial expressions his body movements and the way he is constantly playing with his wedding ring. When the Dr. suggested that the topic of intimacy and sex be removed from the relationship equation he had a look of anger, sadness and disappointment and she caught it even doubting him when he said he was ok with it; he clearly wasn’t. Guess we all have to just keep watching to see the out come. Maybe Ashley is just not attracted to both his looks and personality. Which is why she’s not able to let any walls down.
I find it funny how all of these people that dump all over Ashley fail to see the effort she was putting forth in the past fewof episodes. During her conversation with David’s mom she was showing her genuine interest in her husband’s needs by talking to his mom about his meltdown in the bathroom ( Father’s Day episode). Ashley was naturally having a great time with him during date night. She also makes sure to do little things to show that she cares like ironing his shirts, cleaning the house, etc.. Oh, and remember when she brought him that cupcake? The little things. Lastly, when she was talking to Dr. Cilona (sp?) in last week’s episode she was very emotional. She wouldn’t cry if she wasn’t concerned that her marriage may not work out. That’s how I interpreted it.
As for Sam… Ugh!! Sorry, can’t find anything defendable about that one lol. I hope things get better for them before the experiment is over.
I saw a preview for next episode where you see Sam do a 180! ….and couldn’t agree more with your thoughts on Ashley. I feel for her so bad. 🙁 I’m not saying David hasn’t been amazing – bc he has – but she deserves some credit, too!
I thing Ashley is completely shut off, and not even giving this a chance. David is so cute, nice, and looks like he has his shit together. I do not think she’s being fair to him at all. My god, she let his friends hug her but won’t let the hubs do it? Come on… Next..
Trey and Vanessa – All I can say is these two are adorbs together… Love they way Trey tries to talk to her, and I love the way you can tell she wants to open up to him. Great couple.
Neil and Sam – I can see Sam’s side to thinks, although she is coming across being very harsh. I get it,, When I was that age, I was brutal, and said it like it is too. It’s both good and bad i think.. I think these two have a shot though, as weird as it looks now, they are committed you can clearly see that.
Until next week.. Happy tails.. Dont shop, adopt.
When I met my husband of 23 years, I definitely fell for his personality before his looks. I think Ashley is so focused on appearance that she may be unable to get to a point where she ever finds David attractive. And trust me, after I fell for my husband and his personality, I thought he was the most handsome man I’d ever met. Just don’t know if Ashley will ever get there. As far as Neil and Sam – maybe there is some editing going on – but I feel Sam is verbally abusive to Neil. And that could be a defense mechanism, but sometimes those wounds cut deep. My only hope for success this season is Vanessa and Tres.
I’ll be SO happy if V and T make it! IF they don’t I may cry. They are that CUTE! lol 🙂 xoxo
I agree with all except Sam n Neil. She is a bitch. I think he is afraid to tell her how he feels cuz she reacts poorly everytime. The whole moving into her place was cool if she told him I’m not giving you a key and there is no room for your stuff. It made t easy for her to distance herself and she was way too comfortable there.
The issue that many of us have with Ashley is that she is not even trying; she is not open to the process. Why go on this show if you are not even willing to put forth the effort? She stated that, in the past, her error was focusing too much on looks. Well, guess what? They have given her a golden opportunity to fix that error, and,again, she is not even trying. Try and if it doesn’t work, you move on. Nobody expects these people to truly fall in love in 6 weeks, but you can be nice, respectful and open to the process. Furthermore, the hot, sexy men that she wants to date are also looking for really hot, sexy women; not exactly Ashley. Sam is simply disrespectful, immature and very inconsiderate. I just find it laughable that both Sam and Ashley are acting as if they were God’s gift to this Earth.
Sandy2 you are putting words to many of my thoughts as well! I feel torn in many ways, because on the one hand, I am totally with Jamie on the unbelievability/strangeness around David’s statements of feeling in love with Ashley as well as Ashley’s discomfort, fear, and struggling to open up. BUT then I think the same thing –ok, you have to then think about one’s motivations and foresight about agreeing to sight up for this show. This is the third season, we know how it works and what the process is about. I would also think that the producers and experts would also give a lot of education to the potential cast members as they screen for and then cast them. I mean, I guess we can never fully know what it’s like to actually be in their shoes, but I would hope that if you (the potential future cast member) know that you may be not be up for the task because it’s too overwhelming or too much change all at once (because it will be) then this might not be an appropriate fit. I’d be curious to hear what Jamie thinks because she’s actually lived it, and we haven’t.
I could see that Ashley was obviously uncomfortable during the fish bowl thing & David made it worse by being inappropriate, in my opinion. Some of those questions I haven’t even talked with to my husband of 12 years!! I think there’s something going on behind the scenes that Ashley is seeing that we’re not. David is kinda starting to creep me out!
Jamie … we are all entitled to our opinions!! I have to say, why in the world would ANYBODY agree to being a part of #MAFS, and yet not put any effort into creating a relationship, good or not so good?? You learned yourself that looks are only skin deep we you married Doug. Over time you learned what a great guy he truly was, he shine from the inside out! Let me know if he ever decides to clone himself I do not remember you being so “closed”, like Ashley is being. That woman is not even remotely trying! If that marriage fails, she will only be able to blame herself. Yes David is a little out of line with his ‘falling in love” feelings … however, sometimes it happens to those who want to believe something good will come of it. Trey & Vanessa are definitely adorable … I love watching them! As for Sam & Neil … they both seem to ‘open’ & ‘close’ themselves off to one another. One minute things appear great and another it’s less than desirable. I think Sam is somewhat childish, I don’t believe she is truly ready for a relationship … maybe she’ll prove me wrong.
What I am missing the most about MAFS, is the excitement or maybe better known as drama … either way this season is missing some ‘spice’.
It will be interesting to see what happens in the end … I definitely do not see Ashley & David making it!
I’m so glad I finally found someone else who thinks the same way I do about David. I cannot put my finger on it, but something is off. He was creepy when he was trying to go in for the kiss (“let’s bring it in!”) and I would have been turned off too. The way he is so overboard about everything would definitely push me away and I’d probably end up acting the same way as Ashley. I feel like he just wants physical contact with her just for the physical contact. It wouldn’t matter who it was. There is no way he is falling in love with HER, maybe the idea of her or the idea of a wife in general.
It doesn’t seem like Ashley isn’t attracted to David, it seems like she is downright repulsed by him. She doesn’t even want him to touch her to give comfort when she’s upset. She carries that dog around all day so he doesn’t have an opportunity to be anywhere near her personal space. When he’s away, Belle walks on her own 4 feet. It’s sad.
Sam and Neil are iffy and could go either way. She’s just so mean and controlling at times.
Vanessa and Tres are my favorite, scary couple. I’m always afraid that they are too perfect. It feels a little like the calm before the storm, but I’m hopeful that I’m wrong. I love those two.
Jamie, I like you but you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. Sam has psychosis and Ashley is a narcissist. these women have no business being on that show! we always had hopes with you throughout the show and your willing to learn and adapt I see none of that with these two ladies. Go Vanessa and Tres
Ok, I get it. It’s TV, BUT I don’t believe anyone was forced. So maybe the person selected for you(Sam, Ashley) isn’t your “type”, Well clearly whatever “type” you had wasn’t working or you probably wouldn’t be on the show. I truly hope those interested in genuine love have found or find it. Marriage is sacred and shouldn’t be taken lightly, but afraid or not, attracted to or not, MAFS didn’t draft anyone or send invitations. If you weren’t ready,stay off tv. Tis all. Best wishes to all of them.
If ANY MAN married or not moved into a woman’s home and was told I only have one key….let alone sorry no closet space I’ll give you a draw and all the other rude “THIS IS MY SPACE” comments, well, that is just demeaning. As for Ashley, we don’t see everything of course….but did she think they were going to match her with Brad Pitt? Attraction is important but grace and kindness is equally as important. She does not participate in anything suggested because she is selfish and chooses to not try at all. David wants this to work but he is who is doing all the work. I know the show is over and choices were made but it erks me when the “SPECIALIST” give their reasons for the matches. They are 4 fails and 2 successes at this point and I feel they give false hope
EVERYONE has a past and issues they carry and with the right person work them out Their advice is what we all know as common knowledge. Communicate, share,indulge, trust Using the STRANGER line so redundant IT IS WHAT YOU SIGNED UP FOR.
I had a very successful marriage for 28 years, 4 daughters and now 3 grandchildren and there were always ups and downs, that does not go away just because you know someone, that is REAL life……BTW, I said Had because I am a widow not divorced…
I love Trenessa! I think they have the ideal “MAFS” marriage thus far. Sure they have their issues, but they are working through them. With that out of the way, I like David and Ashley as individuals, but I don’t like them together. Perhaps, something wonderful will unfold, but I’m not so sure. I agree with you about David “falling in love.” That is strange to me. It portrays him as desperate. Let’s face it, sometimes we build a fantasy in which we live, the way we want it to be. Then, reality slaps us in the face and we forget that it was the fantasy that we ourselves created. I hope David keeps his eyes open. Sam and Neil are an odd couple. She’s too controlling and abusive at times. I love her honesty…sometimes, but you don’t always have to say everything you think. Neil is a good balance to her aggression, but is often times victimized by it. Neil comes across fake sometimes when he does try to tackle a subject, but he and I are alike in so many ways, it’s because we know the importance of saying it, but it is uncomfortable to do it. He is a genuine person it is evident. Sam needs to back off. I was absolutely appalled at her throwing him out like that. I’m sorry my comment was so long.
Sorry I think Sam is just a bully. She continually has Neil saying he is sorry. Shes making all her smart rude remarks regardless of his feelings, but when he dares to make a joke or stick his head up above the sand she slams him and throws him out of the house. I do think he hit a nerve. Yea they are getting along better as long as they get along the way she says.
My Son is friends with David’s Sister. He has hung out with David a couple of times and says he is a really nice guy.
I am sure he is such a nice guy! He really seems like it. 🙂
Auntie B. and Jamie I think David is a really nice guy as well. We must remember his family and friends are watching this too. He is embarrassed and feeling rejected. Too much pressure, no one wants to fail.
Ashley allowed his friends to hug her and she hugged them. David’s Mark seem more like her type, (physical speaking) he’s dark and handsome. But he doesn’t like the way she’s treating his friend.
I think Ashley and Sam do not have the personality for this show at all. Sam has anxiety so I’m not sure why ant expert would think it’s a good idea
I feel like you are being overly critical of David’s side and allowing Ashley’s poor attitude and excuses to slide because you relate more to Ashley’s viewpoint than David. David is looking at Ashley with rose-colored glasses for sure, but I’d rather be with some one like that than someone like Ashley who wears green-colored glasses and only even hinted at liking David when she seen how much he could provide for her financially.
Quite frankly, both you and Ashley should have never been cast on the show. Fortunately for both you and Doug, you eventually embraced change and got out of your own way. However, from watching The First Year, it seems like you’re destined to let your past rule your future and may be heading down the wrong path if you truly want your marriage to last. And Ashley, well, hopefully she will call it quits soon so no one has to see the debacle continue to unfold.
None of this is to say neither Doug nor David are perfect and they could do things better for sure. Newsflash — NO ONE IS PERFECT! Marriage is not fair or even 50/50. It shoukd be 100/100. You have to give it your all whether you want to jump his bones or strangle him.
As far as Sam and Neil. She seems almost manic and quite hypocritical about most of her statements. She needs to look at her actions and how she treats people before she gets all holier-than-thou about Neil’s actions. Not sure that they are a good match anymore.
Would it be fair to say that SO many have been overly critical of Ashley? I think so.
I would say that many people have definitely formed an opinion about Ashley, including myself. I’m trying to be open-minded as possible. It just seems very apparent to me that Ashley is not right for the show. Of her our admission, it takes her months to get intimate in most of her relationshipstatements and couple that with the fact that she isn’t even remotely physically attracted to David and you have now set yourself up the perfect recipe for an epic fail.
I love the experts, but I can’t see why they would have chosen Ashley for the show unless she bald-face lied to them. Either that or they needed to create a surefire bad outcome. I hope and will believe, until its priven otherwise, that it wasn’t the latter.
Hey Jamie! I was wondering if you identified with Sam’s fear, occasional anxiety and risk taking in the experiment which I feel you both shared?
I totally relate to both sam and ashley!
Ouch, I really find it hard/can’t stomach reading comments where people hardcore insult the participants of this show. YES, they chose this ‘journey’/venture, do get incentive, etc. but saying that someone you don’t know is ‘crazy’ or psycho or mean or a bad person – is just silly. These people aren’t millionaire celebrities that probably have resources and publicists and tools to help them deal. They’re regular ole’ people that signed up to do this quote radical ‘experiment’ … and unfortunately the trolls still scour the Internet and heir social media accounts to bully them. Please, I encourage you to encourage your followers to follow the best practice of not judging or criticizing these people in such a nasty way. Of all people, I’m sure you know and remember what that’s like.
Noooooo. Ashley isn’t even giving David a chance. You can still be affectionate and kind to someone even though you aren’t attracted to them. But what truly concerned me about your post is the fact that Sam is emotionally abusive to Neil and you don’t even see that. It’s depressing to watch.
Great as always Sam & Neil remind me of you and doug. I hate all the hate she is getting. People don’t understand how much is being thrown at them, the pressure, the cameras and lets not forget editing. Ashley I feel for I will say when my husband and I met we were not only opposites and still are with everything but I hated him and told him so lol. He literally said to me after what probably would be called stalking now with flowers, candy, calls, showing up at my work, he said give me one date if you don’t want anything to do with after that night just say it. So of course I have a snarky, smartas* sense of humor) & said don’t worry I will! But he loved me at that point, he did is homework. Took me to a concert of someone I loved going to &have been to many times. He went thru an agency paid an enormous amount of money for incredible seats. After that he took me to the North End my favorite bought canoli’s another favorite I’m Italian . While waiting for them to be filled he told the clerk this is the girl I’m going to marry & I said don’t count on it. I had every intention of getting thru this night and getting rid of him. We went by the waterfront with our dessert &he pulled out a cooler with two champagne glasses, I do not drink never have but I have a fierce addiction to diet coke none of this he knew . So he pulled out a diet coke I was shocked I had never had a drink with him, never sat with him long enough for him to know. He had champagne I had diet coke . He had a talk with my mom which I had no knowledge of & it sounds creepy so before I go on I’ll explain. He sent me flowers, he wouldn’t take no for an answer so I started refusing delivery. I thought yep I won but nope the flowers kept arriving & I would tell the delivery guy take them back & he said no can do he paid double. so they would get delivered & what did I do I left them outside to die. Now by now your probably thinking omg she is horrible she behaves like sam but stick with me .I’m a huge Sam & Neil fan whether they end up married of friends don’t care I love them. Now being Italian my mother was not one for ever holding her tongue. She told me I was being mean and cruel. I explained to her I wasn’t that I didn’t just not care for him I couldn’t stand him. I had asked him to stop wasting his money go find someone else. The next flowers that were delivered by this time it was very awkward for the driver she asked for the phone number of the person ordering them. Back then things were different back then. The owner said to her if you can make this stop because the flowers were just going to waste he said I’ll give you the number. My mom said if he orders anymore she would bring them to the nursing home. The flowers just stopped I was relieved but at the same time you know the saying you don’t miss what you don’t know. My mom had called my now husband & asked him to dinner while I was working. They talked for over four hours. She told him she really doesn’t like you, that when he said to her I’m going to marry her, she thought he was crazy & told him he deserved better lol. But by the end of the meal to this day I don’t know what he said but my mom said yes you will and gave her blessing. As well as telling him I liked canolis’ diet coke. All of which were in that cooler. He poured the champagne, the diet coke, & said this night was the most perfect night of his life. If I said to him no more he would die a happy man. If I said yes he would spend the rest of his life making me happy, Now before I go on even though he went out of his way to make a perfect evening tailored to me not him, spent a ton of money I still was not very nice. I barely talked to him, when I did it was short yes and nos. He tried to get close to me while walking I went further away. He went to hold my hand when he said that & yep I pulled away. I had every intention of telling this man who liked everything I hate and vice versus to get lost. But seeing the thought, time, effort still telling me after I behaved not so nice that he would die a happy man even if I told him to get lost. Before I even realized what I was saying when he said what’s it going to be (in a meatloaf impression one of my favorites sorry I’m an 80s girl) out of my mouth came yes. I was so shocked & my face must have said that . Because the poor man said you said yes but i know you mean no right he said don’t say anything yet just think. I didn’t think I knew if someone went thru this much for someone who wasn’t really very nice to him that maybe he deserved another chance . Me being me I said yes to another date just one date. lol. 30 years later we are still together, we have nothing in common he loves meat, poultry, dairy, animals he hunts like deer etc, hunting, fishing, doesn’t like to read, doesn’t watch a lot of tv, loves coffee & beer. . Me I eat no meat, fish, chicken , no dairy, I’m a huge animal lover do not approve of hunting, fishing, killing animals to wear, I love to read and I love tv. & no I could never live with someone who killed bambi for food. That being said it works. Now back to my point of the post. I could be deemed just like Sam is on tv as mean & horrible I was but there was a back story. We don’t get to see the back story on any of these couples well Jamie knows what they go thru but the public doesn’t . Imagine meeting a stranger, marrying them, going on vacation, moving in together & all that stress pressure while being filmed. There are those who say well they signed up for it. yes they did but how could anyone have any idea how hard how stressful it is unless they have done it? I’m awkward, shy , a snarky smarta*ss and when I’m nervous that is what you see. So I think all those raking sam over the coals should just wait & see. Also a lot has to do with editing. I also love Neil but while she is being raked over the coals he has done & said some not nice things & isn’t taking the brunt of it . I don’t get these are adults on the internet criticizing the cast , calling them names for being mean and rude hello pot meet kettle. For Ashley I’m going to say this yes she knew what she was getting into. Yes she is making her intentions know &may seem to be not even trying. But let me ask you this who here hasn’t dated someone that no matter what they do or try it doesn’t work? I would love to see them work out, but for me what I see is someone who clearly doesn’t have feelings for him, I think she knows that this isn’t going to work out, I don’t think she is being mean I see her as not wanting to lead him on. In the interview tonight with the dr she all but said this isn’t working, I’m not attracted I don’t think it will happen I don’t want to hurt him and you see the dr pushing for her to try it out. If I’m wrong and they end up together great. But I feel like she is in a rock& hard place. I think she knows this isn’t what she wants, she doesn’t want to lead him on & the show isn’t willing to let that play out yet. I also get so mad because everyone is raking her over the coals, she is mean, frigid, not trying hurting him what did she expect, she is stuck up because she likes a certain hair color etc. The thing is d&again attack the show. They do hours of interviewing, ask them what they want need. I get that truly what you think what you want for a match isn’t always right (hello my husband) . But that being said when your marrying a perfect stranger, & you know what type they find attractive I don think that is too much to ask. I feel by not listening to that they set them up for failure. Yes looks are not everything & you agree to do this. but for me I would hope at the end of the aisle there would be someone that would normally catch my eye because what they are doing is very hard. Also she was very clear how big of a deal to her that was so why would they do the exact opposite? I get that Jamie wasn’t attracted to doug either & not everyone gets an amazing doug who fought to make it work. But at the same time its horrible to have watched Jamie on her wedding day, to see Doug get hurt when he saw it its not right. Yes they were very lucky they got past it & found love. but why put that obstacle course in front of them if the person is very clear its not what they want? I also hate watching the women always raked over the coals on social media first Jamie, now Sam & Ashley don’t get me started on last season ladies
We know that YOU know how this tale ends. So you shouldn’t be sharing “insights”.
I actually don’t know how it ends.
I have sympathy for both David and Ashley, Ashley has it harder than anyone else, she doesnt really know how to make a relationship work, she seems like she has always spent most her time on her career and schooling so I think it was a big step for her to give that up! She is stressed out with school and she doesn’t feel a connection with David like she thought she would with her husband!! I think David is trying way too hard (he is sweet) but a little too pushy for Ashley ‘s personality! Yes she should have told him what she needs from him sooner, but apparently she feels intimidated by him.. she shuts down every time he talks to her but I understand that she doesn’t want to hurt his feelings because she knows how bad he wants to feel loved (which would scare me too!!) He needs to be more patient and she needs to communicate better!! And Samantha needs to work on her Anger issues, as Neil seems pretty laid back & patient, I still cant believe she called him fake and then flipped out when he said it back..
I love the show and particularly loved your season. To me it seems like things have gone down hill since. I really don’t understand why two of the three couples were even matched this time. On your season I could see the compatibility early on. I’m sure the experts have their reasons, but Neil and Sam don’t seem super compatible. She seems like she’ll end up bullying him if they stay together. She doesn’t seem to respect him, And I feel so bad for David. He really seems to be putting his all in and Ashley doesn’t even seem to be trying. If she is so focused on physical attraction and looks maybe a blind experiment wasn’t the way to go. I know she says she wants to change, but she hasn’t really appeared to be putting her all in. She avoids difficult discussions and doesn’t even allow him in as a friend a lot of the time. I think Vanessa and Tres are very cute and agree with the others that they are probably the only ones with a shot at making it.
You’re kidding right? Sam was horrible with Neil! She threw him out just because he joked around with her?!? She’s emasculated him, referred to him as “the cook” (Betty Cocker) statement. Who does that?!? Maybe you applaud this since you kinda did the same to Doug throughput the show. (My opinion). Like arranging for him to meet your ex??? Unacceptable! Like moving your hubby into your old place and then throwing him out ! I feel sorry for David, just like I felt sorry for Doug!
I only have hope for one couple that is Tres and Vanessa. Sam is way to critical and Neil to patient. David is a gem and Ashley a scared child. I am married almost 50 years and marriage is a full time job. They all need to work harder and the pay will be worth it
I have high hopes for Tres and Vanessa too! 😉
Another fan and I were talking about the show over the weekend, and here’s what she said about Ashley, which I completely agree with. “Ashley wanted someone who was SEXY! David is a nice guy, and nice looking, but, he isn’t sexy. That’s something she clearly wanted.” Re: David saying that he is falling in love with her, he is just so friggin’ anxious to settle down. It IS a case of being in love with love. BTW, Neil is quirky, but Sam is bat shit crazy. This one isn’t going to work out either. But Tres and Vanessa, YES! 🙂
I can definitely see where you’re coming from! …I so hope Tres and Vanessa work! I don’t know about the other two. Only time will tell.
I was on the verge of tears watching David and Ashley. He’s trying so hard and is it just me, but I never ever saw him hint or pressure her physically. I’ve said this before, but I think he needs to blow a gasket and stand up for himself and that will get to her. Vanessa has trust issues. Whoa, I TOTALLY GET THAT! Her father walked out and never contacted her again. DOH. She WILL have trust issues. Totally normal.
I couldn’t even imagine … my heart aches for V! :-/
Well be watching Jamie. And all because of you. Your journey. Your risk-taking and bravery.
So we’re still #MAFS Fans.
It’s our Date Night all cozy in our bed!
This show is getting crazy again.
We appreciate your take on things above.
We are so curious which couples will choose to stay married.
But most importantly, we are so happy that you are finding love and contentment in your marriage.
Lots of love from your proud uncle and m
aww, that’s so good to hear! 🙂
Well, my opinion so far of David is that he wants to give it his best and seems to be doing that at this point. Ashley, it’s sad to say I think may actually just be doing it for the money. She is just so cold towards him no matter what he tries to do. I just don’t understand why she even signed up for this show if she didn’t even plan to even try unless they had dark hair and features! Please! That is so shallow! As for Niel and Sam, I did not think they had a chance before the last episode! Now, I think they just might make it! Yay! Tres and Vanessa are just so cute together! I love these two and think they have a really great shot and staying together! <3
I agree – Tres and Vanessa seem to have a real shot at this! 🙂
I think you’ve nailed it.
I’m a bit worried about Vanessa and her lack of trust. Sound a bit familiar? lol I hope she’s got over the bad thoughts that made her insecure when Tres said he had dated but until MAFS he wasn’t looking for a wife. That was unfair. He obviously wanted to marry or else he wouldn’t have signed up. I mean normally, you progress from one date to two…to long term, etc. I think if they can overcome his crazy work schedule, Tres & Vanessa have great potential.
Frankly, I don’t have much hope for David and Ashley. I predict that at the end of 6 weeks, unless she’s totally does a 180 from where she’s at at week 3, he’s going to expect her to be farther along than she will be and that will crush all forward progress made to that point. He seems to have higher/speedier expectations for this experiment and she has not disengaged the brake. She’s still a bit stuck on not being attracted to him and committed, seemingly overly so, to taking things very slow. I believe that if the experts would have known that neither David nor Ashley were incapable of adjusting their individual expectation timelines, they would not have been matched.
Sam and Neal are, in my opinion, a great match.. But…it’s going to take time to get there. Thankfully, it appears that Sam’s realized her self defense mechanism of running people over is not required.
I’ve been married almost 30 years. 28 (non consecutive days lol) of them have been fantastic! Unlike dating, where you see each other only when you want to, and when you feel great, when you look your best, marriage is 24/7/365. It’s truly for better and for worse. There are no sick days. I want to go out to dinner as planned and hubby had a really bad day at work, and wants to order in. What do you do? How & when do you compromise. Most of the time, it shouldn’t be hard work, but know it can be. I wouldn’t change a thing.
I agree with some of your comments but the main thing that I think when I watch this season is: What did they think they were signing up to do? I realize it may be more difficult than expected but I felt like in your season, all of the couples stayed open and tried in the relationships. This season, they all seem so closed off, scared, and fearful. Definitely feel bad for them and it isn’t as fun to watch.
Hi Jamie,
Do you get any behind the scenes perks from previously being on the show? I always wonder if you are given any insight on how these couples are really doing (via the producers or whomever), since you were on the show previously. Or are you just like the rest of us watching it unfold for the first time on TV each week? Thank you!
Cathy
i’m just like the rest of you – watching as they air.
Can’t wait to hear your thoughts tonight! Hi from Canada !!
I’ll begin LIVE tweeting at 9 on the dot! 😀
I think you’re totally onto something with David! I hadn’t really considered it until you said something but maybe he’s just trying to play the nice guy on tv but it can’t be the real him? Who would fall in love with someone whose completely closed off and doesn’t even want to talk to you, much less touch you? I don’t get it.
I believe love is a choice, a decision and a gift, it is more than a feeling. More importantly, being committed to a person via a respect vow is far more significant than being “in love”. My parents have been married 70 years, I’ve been married almost 40. Feelings of love ebb and flow but making a choice to stay committed and keep your vow MAKES a marriage last while waiting for in love tides to wash in again and again. If David understands this and his stated love of Ashley is his decision and choice then he has the best potential to stay married.
Chose to love, feelings WILL follow.
Jaime, I totally adore you and Doug. Both the 1st Season Couples that stayed together were my favorite. Monet, thank GOD got lucky and divorced…I have to disagree with you with Ashley. You know, Ashley knew what she was getting herself into, she knew the things she would have to do to try and make a “married at first sight” marriage work. She had already seen two seasons of it and new the expectations. It wasn’t like any of this was going to be a surprise. Yet, she hasn’t tried…honestly the only one trying is David and even that is getting old. I completely hear you when you say using the L word is too soon, but lets be honest…some people know right away. I’m not going to say I agree with using the L word so soon is smart…but I can see it happening…just not with this couple. I believe there are expectations with this type of experiment that you realize you must be ready for just like sleeping in the same bed and going on a honeymoon. This is part of the experiment as should be kissing, hugging, holding hands, and playing the fishbowl game. I believe that in Ashley’s case…she isn’t trying and and I don’t see it changing any time soon.
Sam and Neil, well this is another couple I do not see making it past friendship if even that. First of Sam is so controlling and unforgiving. She reminds me of a parent who never wants to admit they are wrong and is never willing to bend or meet half ways. If things are not her way, then she doesn’t like them, throws them back in your face, or worse yet blames them on you and not her. She is used to being on her own and I think her past relationships have not worked because though she claims she wants the man to be the “MAN” which she considers is someone who takes charge (I disagree as men don’t have to always be dominant), I think that in reality she has always had an issue with men being in charge and not giving her breathing room. Again, Neil seems calm and serene and so far…he looks like the good guy.
Tre and Vanessa look adorable seem to have clicked, but I am still waiting for their fears to start showing. Will he give her always the attention she wants and will she meet him half way when he doesn’t. They both have childhood dreams but seem to be emotionally and physically attracted to each other. I just hope that it continues through their fears also. Just my opinion! Keep posting honey, I love to hear from one of my favorite ever couples!
I think David just really wants to be married and have the love his parents had. I feel bad for him being matched with Ashley. I feel no ill will towards her. I feel I wasn’t put on this earth to judge people and it is not my place to sit in judgment of her. It is clear she is not even remotely interested in David as anything more than a possible friend. She also seems to have her mind made up about that as well. I wish she would give him a chance but it isn’t my call. I really hope in the future, David does find a wife who is into him. I have a feeling he will be just fine after the show and experiment is over. I hope Trey and Vanessa will be a success story for the experts. Although, last season I wouldn’t have thought those couples would have split either, so you never know. I think the experts did well matching Sam and Neil. I think Neil is exactly what Sam needs to balance her out. As for any of them being in love, or even thinking they are falling in love, that is crazy talk. They may think they are in love, but true love takes time. My husband and I were together 3 months before we said the words. That was after being friends for several months before we started dating. I hope they find they can grow into a successful marriage, just as you and your husband have. Marriage is constant work, if they are up to putting the work in they will be married a very long time! Thank you for putting your lives out there for all of us to see. It makes me remember, no one is perfect and others have the same stuggles in thier lives too. (I am a bit of a perfectionist, lol)
Its just to early to tell, I feel sorry for David and Neil it has to really hurt to be treated like that, I hope it all works out for all of them, David is trying hard Ashley seems like she just in it for the money, fame? not sure. she seems really cold. Tres and Vanessa are really cute there is something about Tres I dont trust I dont know what it is yet and last Neil and Sam Im not sure it could go either way at first I said oh no but she seems to be opening up now. I hope it works out for all of them. Im a big fan Doug and Jamie(you) is my favorite of all the couples
There was rumors going around that the couples do not really move in together but on day,of filming they meet at a house and they tape it looking like they do. Is this a fact? Just curious. Thanks!
Jamie, you can speak to this experience better than any of us and I agree with a lot of what you said. There’s so much that we don’t get to see that may change our perspective some, but the couple that concerns me most, like the majority of people, is Ashley and David. The experts must have seen something in her that we don’t or that isn’t shown on the show to have selected her. I get that she is protecting herself and that three weeks isn’t much time to really get to know someone, but I wonder why she would even sign up for an experiment like this one if she is so closed off and knows that it takes her a really long time to warm up to someone. Add in the stress of nursing school and not being attracted to her husband and it’s the perfect storm of complications that may doom this relationship before it really has a chance to start. You touched on something in a previous blog about how the only time Ashley really seemed to come to life was when David offered to support them and pay the vast majority of expenses. I really hope that she is not that person. As for David, I agree that he so desperately wants to be in love that he may be forcing things that aren’t really there in order to make to happen. Regardless, I wish the best for all of them and I hope you know that you are doing good things in this world by being so open and sharing your experiences and your faults and all the struggles you and Doug have had. I wish you all the love and happiness you deserve and thanks so much for opening up to us!
I think you are right on the money with your critique. Let’s see how tonight unfolds. Watching David and Ashley is painful to me. I just think Ashley just wants this to end
I think David is in love with love. He wants it so bad … And I totally get it, but he needs to put the brakes on. I hate to say desperate but that’s how it’s oozing out. It might not sound like it, but I am routing for them!!
I feel the same as you. David is falling for her when there are so many red flags. He’s a great guy, don’t get me wrong. I think he and Ashley could be happy together. I’m nervous for tonight’s episode with Neil and Sam. Hope the commercials are just making us think there is drama.
I agree with everything you said, Jamie! I do think Ashley and David may not be the right match. She’s definitely being held back by her fear, and doesn’t seem to be willing to work on it at all. She’s not taking any risks or starting to open up any more than on day 1. I don’t know if there is hope for that relationship….
My husband and I have watched from season 1 (we were getting ready to get married and thought I was nuts watching it, but he sat next to me every episode and gave his input). This season, he said exactly when you said, Jamie, that David is trying to hard, almost faking it and loves the idea of love, but totally shouldn’t be there yet. I’m excited to see what the rest of the season holds because I feel Neil and Sam can totally be you and Doug and Tres and Vanessa have what it takes to stay married!
Thanks, Jamie, for sharing your take on the couples at 3 weeks into their experiment. I agree, for the most part, about David & Ashley. The possibility of Ashley falling for him is looking more and more remote with each episode. I think it’s a little strong, though, to use the “cray” term about David’s feelings. My first sense of his comment was that of wishful thinking. I think he simply wants to be in love with her, and unfortunately said it out loud…probably should have kept that to himself.
Tres & Vanessa…I agree…I think they’re doing just fine when their “issues” are about the little things, like whether or not they’re ready to share bathrooms. That’s real life marriage talk
Yes, now that you mention it, Sam & Neil are resembling your journey…a little. I do agree that they show some promise…yea!!
Anyway, so glad you chimed in on this…I’ve watched your journey with your hubby from the start