Married At First Sight: The First Year
Season 2 Episode 2
Well, that was tough to watch. I don’t know what’s more difficult – having to re-live the struggles I’ve recently had with my husband, Doug or watch myself be a complete snot to him?! Married At First Sight: The First Year has been so incredibly difficult to swallow this season.
Listen, I could go on and on trying to explain why I feel and say what I do, but at the end of the day I need to own up to my mistakes and flaws – not defend them. I am trying to learn from my problems as I work through them.
There’s really not a whole lot I want to talk about on last week’s episode. But one thing I do want to mention is how amazing and supportive my in-laws are – my mother & father in law in particular. To hear what my husband says to his dad about our marriage makes my heart hurt so bad. The bitter truth always does. But, to watch Doug Sr. kind of look out for me makes the sting hurt a bit less. His parents have always been so warm and welcoming to me. (Well, at least his dad. His mom took a bit to warm up.) 🙂
At the end of the day I’m just trying to live and learn. I know I’m not perfect. As a matter of fact, I am far, far from it. But, I AM willing to look at myself and see where I need to change. I have been spending my whole life protecting myself from being hurt. I have never just let loose and trusted that I’d be ok. That is such a scary thought for me. Who will be there for me if I do?
I’m not necessarily looking forward to watching tonight’s episode. You’ll see the reality of all of the marital problems we’ve been having – I’m going to need a big glass of wine and my #MAFSFamily by my side! You guys have always been so encouraging and understanding. Thanks for all the love and support guys!
XOXO,
Jamie
P.S Doug and I will be taking over WetPaint’s Facebook and Instagram account! Come hang with us here: Doug And Jamie LIVE answering your questions!!!
Jamie Otis
16 comments
Jamie, thank you for being so open! I LOVE my husband so much, but sometimes marriage is HARD!! And those days I think the same way…is this right? But I know in my heart it is, but there are definitely hard days! Thanks for sharing! Makes us feel like we are not alone
Jamie: Please stop beating yourself up. It’s terrible how people feel it’s okay to send mean-spirited messages. It’s unacceptable and only breaks a person’s spirit. Please don’t allow the negative of the world to break you or take your happiness away. You are taking steps to address your weaknesses and struggles, as well as steps to build on your strengths. I do feel you and Doug are a good match. You seem to balance one another. I’m not one to give advice because like you and everyone else in this world we live, I do have my weaknesses and struggles. Seeking counsel from a someone that specializes in human behaviors is perfect. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Don’t be too hard on the man you love. We are not perfect creatures. You are a lovely person with so much love to give. Doug is a lovely person that only wants to give his love. Allow yourself to love you and to be loved. xo
No judgement or self-righteous opinions on how you should or shouldn’t live your life from me. We all have struggles and challenges that we must overcome. I hardly think anyone is truly in a position to cast stones until they’ve overcome their own demons. I only wish to recommend books by Brene Brown; “Daring Greatly” and “Rising Strong”. To say they’re life-changing is an understatement. As well she has an amazing TED talk called the The Power of Vulnerability that is worth watching. Keep being you!
I really love getting good advice! I will definitely check out those books. Thanks!
Dear Jamie & Doug, I am rooting for you both to come through to the other side stronger than ever. Tbh, I have had thoughts of my ex boyfriend of 4 yrs … over the 21 yrs of my marriage. But I would never say it out loud to my husband. Things that we think at times, that we know would hurt our loved ones esp hubby’s should not be said. It serves no purpose,unless you’re going to do something about it. Honesty is great, but somethings need to b unspoken. I do wish you all the best. Doug is a KEEPER!
Thanks Tina!
You’re Welcome! The renewal of your vows was so beautiful. It definitely displayed your commitment to each other. The love between you & Doug is undeniable. As another fan said, we don’t personally know either of you. I think you both are very brave to allow cameras into your lives. We all make mistakes and say stuff we wish we hadnt. I would not want to look back & watch our early years. Even though my hubby and I dated for years & had known each other since high school being married is totally different. We had to grow together I believe as a couple. I broke the cycle of abuse by living a quiet calm life. I come from a dysfunctional home with an alcoholic bi polar, depressed father. And a mother who was/is subservient. I chose a man the complete opposite of my dad. I thank God for him everyday. We have an 18 yr old son he’s in college now. I wouldn’t change a thing,bc even though I had my heart broken by an ex, it lead me to living a better life. A life with God, Love & Family. XOXO T.
I’ve been married 37 years. Unlike you, I had the luxury of making my mistakes without America watching. I can imagine that the public scrutiny makes this all the more difficult. If you ever feel so inclined, you might want to read Spirit Controled Temperment by Tim LaHaye. It helped to turn my marriage around in the early days. It describes the pros and cons of different temperaments. I realized that many of the things my husband did were based on his temperament. This helped me not take things so personally. Many of the traits I loved about him most had a down side. Example: he was adventurous which I loved, but he was also on the other hand impulsive. (Which drove me nuts) I wish you two the very best. Love each other, help each other, forgive each other and don’t give up on each other. There will be a better day.
Thanks for the recommendation. I appreciate it!
Hi Jamie & Doug,
It’s been wonderful watching you two on last season and painful on this one. None of us really know either of you so giving advice just adds to your plate of problems. I hope that your road is becoming less rocky and that the upcoming episodes wont be so painful for you all to watch as well!..Best Wishes!!! C xox
thanks!
I’ve been a big fan of you and Doug on the show. I just wanted to say, after tonight’s episode, in a motherly way… It’s okay if Doug doesn’t meet your standards of how a man should act. It’s not okay for you to expect him to meet your standards. He is who he is. You are who you are. No one is the good guy or bad guy. Letting him go is a better choice then torturing him for not being what you need him to be. But!! And a big but, kindness trumps every other emotion. You can never go wrong with kindness. I see Doug as not only always kind, but also loyal and patient. Think real real hard before you throw that away. I’m cheering for you to find your right path.
Thank you so much for this! xo
God Bless you both!! Love that you both are working on your marriage. It does take work!
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Jamie, at least you’re working on your personal issues & marriage. You’re absolutely right Doug’s parents are the best, so you both need to continue to ask them for advice/guidance. Also, keep in mind you’re breaking the cycle of your childhood when it comes to trust & marriage. Jamie, I know it feels good to know your future children will be able to have a front row seat to a loving marriage, because you put in the work to help yourself improve & to help your marriage. We do better when we know better. Also, I suggest you & Doug spend one weekend a month away from your phones, TV & family and have true quality time by yourselves, just talking about everything & anything and relaxing together.