Happy, Happy! Joy, Joy!
I know I promised to blog about Married At First Sight: The First Year after each episode. And I will. But, this week is Thanksgiving and I am in the mood to give thanks and be cheerful! My little sister, Leah’s due date was yesterday so any day now I will be an aunt – again! 🙂
Gosh, it has been absolute torture to re-live our fights, arguments, insecurities, and what was really the lowest point of our marriage. But, there’s always something positive in something perceived as solely negative. And actually, there are a lot of great things that came from us having to watch our struggles all over again – and so publicly.
Silver Lining
I knew after my experience on Married At First Sight that I could grow a lot as an individual by documenting our journey and then re-living it as it aired for millions to view. I really learned so much about myself and my behavior as I watched the first few weeks of my marriage play back on Married At First Sight. I was so embarrassed to watch. I literally cried after every single episode. I saw characteristics in myself that I was so ashamed of. I never realized I had these traits because I had never really been able to see them before. So, yeah… I knew there was a lot of personal growth to be discovered when we agreed to continue documenting our marriage on MAFS The First Year. I was hopeful, but I didn’t realize how much my relationship could grow by being able to watch it back. (More on this later…I’m writing about book about it.)
Since day one Doug and I promised each other to always be the same on and off camera. (Yes, the night of our wedding we were talking deal breakers not having wild sex or making any love. How’s that for a romantic wedding night. lol) As a lot of you know, we were complete strangers when we married and we knew the first six weeks together was the “experiment” so there’d be cameras around all.the.time. No matter how strange it was, we needed to be as genuine as possible so that when the experiment ended our relationship wouldn’t end as well. My goal going into Married At First Sight was to have a happy marriage with a house and kids. (CLEARLY-ha!) But I wasn’t willing to live in Lala Land and just pretend the stranger “husband” and our relationship was perfect just so that I could get there. I wanted our relationship to be authentic. I wanted to look into my husbands eyes and feel the love between us. And we did make it there at one point, but that all came crashing down when we moved out of NYC and into Jersey – a state where I didn’t know a single soul. (Among other reasons…like me testing my husband to see if his love was true. I will explain more in my book.) I pretended it was fine, but inside I grew so lonely.
Side Note: I am proud of myself and Doug for keeping our promise and being honest with ourselves and each other throughout our marriage – both on and off camera. The thing about this is that you have to be real. Real isn’t about hiding your poor qualities just so you can save face for camera and make a happy-go-lucky TV show. The only problem with this is that there are millions of people who see what real looks like … it’s not always pretty. It can actually be downright UGLY. Then they judge accordingly. I could have tried pretending to be a “perfect little wifey” but at the end of the day I’d rather have no “fans” and have a real marriage than have a fake marriage with a lot of fans.
Favorite Quote From Doug
I wanted to be cheerful but I jumped right into how difficult it’s been … there’s a taste of the truth (and my ADD) for ya! The struggle is real. {Pun intended.} Back on track, lol. My husband is a pretty smart man. I’ll admit it – I have been a bit lonely since moving to New Jersey. I hate to seem “desperate” or “needy” so I just never really said anything to Doug. What’s funny is that by me not saying anything and trying to solve it myself I ended up acting more “desperate” and “needy’ – which is the exact opposite of what I wanted! How embarrassing! ha.
There’s no doubt I wanted to have a baby in hopes that starting a family would make my situation a bit less painful. HELLO! What on earth was I thinking?! And this is where I can now thank my husband for being more intelligent than me. I was acting and thinking only on fixing my feelings. It would be so unfair to bring a kid into this world like that. That’s not what I really wanted. I was just searching for something to fix our problems. And I guess subconsciously I went with what I grew up watching even though I know in my heart that that is the worst thing you could do.
Doug hit the nail on the head when he was skyping with Dr. Pepper. He said, “Buying a house and having a baby isn’t the solution.” This is a small example of what I mean by watching it back and learning so much. I am a grown woman. And I’d like to think I am pretty smart. I am from a family where we pop kids out to make baby daddy’s stay and try to fix our relationships. I’ve seen first hand how that is the worst idea. …..but somehow I still ended up going there. I needed to hear that and quite frankly, hearing such wisdom from my husband’s lips makes me really respect and appreciate him more.
Abandoned Dogs Need Love, Too
How SWEET was this? Doug planned a date night at our local pet shelter where we could help the volunteers with their pups. I love dogs. I mean, I really, really love them. They truly are a man’s best friend. And I just get so sad when I think about all the sweet pups without homes. This date was so great because we got to have fun with these homeless rescue pups. Playing and caring for them felt good. Not just because we were helping needy pups but because my husband took time to really think of a good date that would be meaningful to me. And then he surprised me with it. I love surprises and I LOVE him! (Insert heart-eyed emoji here!)
What You Can Expect Tonight
Tonight is the last episode of the first part of Married At First Sight: The First Year. We are taking a mid-season break so we can watch MARRIED AT FIRST SIGHT! Yes, MAFS is back with a whole new set of couples!!! I cannot wait to see it! I am hoping and praying that these guys are successful. Last season was so tough to watch. I wish each of these couples luck! Doug and I will be cheering them on every single Tuesday night! And, I will continue blogging through their season! I can’t wait to chat with you guys about these new couples! As always, Doug and I will be tweeting and periscoping LIVE tonight for our mid-season finale! (I sit here now at 10 am typing this in my living room, but I may be be upstate New York with my sister tonight because she has a doctors appointment today! I hope they decide to induce her TONIGHT so we can have a Thanksgiving baby!) 🙂
I love hearing back from you guys! Please leave a comment below. I don’t get a chance to reply to them all, but I do read them all. AND, I have been posting some of my favorite things over on my “Fashion Forward” blog. Check it out here: Fashion Forward!
HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO MY MAFS FAMILY!
Jamie Otis
63 comments
You are a great example of keeping it REAL.. The good, the bad and the ugly. But most admirable of all this is that you have continued to share with your fans the progress, the lessons and the love. Sharing out life experiences with others always touches someone else’s life who may have the same struggles. We are on this earth for a much greater reason than just to exist. Keep doing what you are doing
Just finished binge watching your season of MAFS! Fell in love with you and Doug! I’ve been married for almost 19 years to the love of my life and it’s still work. My mom has a saying – you don’t get married and live happily ever after – a marriage is work! I remind myself of it daily! Congrats to you and Doug on the hard work you have put into your marriage! I can’t wait to binge watch Married at First Sight – The first year on my FYI app! xoxo
Glad to hear things are better with you and Doug. Give yourself a big ‘ol hug and give one to Doug. Both of you deserve all the happiness in the world and to deserve to grow old with one another. Ignore those toxic people that put you down. I can’t believe how rude people can be. It is plain as day that you and Doug are in love because you can see it in your eyes and in Doug’s eyes.
Hugs to you and Doug!
thank you 🙂 hugs to you too!
Thank you for sharing your stories and real emotions. Happy Thanksgiving 🙂
Jamie,
I have watched every episode of married at first site. I find your honesty and vulnerability admirable. I am also an RN from NJ and can truly relate to so much of your life. I think it is truly a gift to be able to watch back your feelings actions and reactions.If you look at this as a gift it can be used so constructively. God bless you and Doug and your future together.
I can’t understand why you continue to want your ex in your marriage. And the fact you told Doug your ex is your best friend. If he is so important to you why are you mot with him instead of Doug? You have all of the signs of a co-dependent, in that you depend on others for your happiness. I went through counseling to learn that about myself. Believe me when I understood and my life changed, I have been much happier. You need to get involved in volunteer work and the best thing is to find a church for both of you and get involved there. The family that prays together stays together. Concentrate on somethings besides yourself. It can be very rewarding. Children who grow up in a Christian home are very fortunate. I wish the best for you and Doug but having an outsider in your marriage is not a good start. After all, he is your ex for a reason(s).
Happy Thanksgiving, Jamie (and Doug). I’m not going to give you my history, but it is similar to yours. I am married. I have been tripping over my husband since he was 11 (I was almost 17). We married when he was 23. Yes, we are still together. Marriage isn’t easy, and as you mentioned, there is tremendous growth in seeing yourself, especially through the eyes of the one you marry. It’s easy to sabotage our relationship and hurt our spouse. And it takes time to rebuild shattered parts of ourself, after the words have been exchanged, but the good news? It’s all possible. Love allows us to forgive and keep giving to each other. My husband is my best friend, and there is a trust that grows. It is slow, steady, and consistent. It took me a long time to believe he wouldn’t leave at some point. But he is still here. He tells me his biggest success in life is our marriage! And this makes me feel so loved!. Jamie! You and Doug have something really special. Continue to communicate your heart. And tell him your fears! If you hurt him with your insecurities..apologize. You are both blessed to have each other. As you are learning to be a wife, he is trying to figure out his role as husband. On the bright side? It gets easier with each year. Hold each other close and remember to be kind. The house and kids will come when you are both ready. The best in life is worth waiting…
I respect your decision to stay real. Last week I taught my students about the need to communicate, even about hard things and that when we don’t it destroys our relationships. Even though some people judge you, I think this series is a blessing to American culture because it shows us what it really takes to build a successful marriage. It is sometimes very hard work. Perhaps your show will help others count the cost of marriage before jumping in based solely on feelings. Thank you for being authentic and courageous, we need examples like you.
Jamie, I am not married yet, but have been living with my boyfriend for 2 years and am getting married next summer! I hope you know that there are people who cheer you on and look up to you despite your everyday struggles. No relationship is perfect. And trust me when I say, it can feel like it’s completely falling apart at times. But if you are committed to each other, you’ll be okay. I’ve watched you guys from the beginning. And I hope you know that the issues you guys face, every relationship does. You guys have helped me understand parts of my relationship as well. And im rooting for you. Not only in your relationship, but life and work and everything else. I can see you have a big heart. Keep it up girl. You’re doing good! And dont forget to take a breath every now and again. Until then, I’ll keep you guys in my prayers! You’re doing good Jamie♡♡♡
Wanted to let you know that I gave really enjoyed watching you and Doug since the beginning of the show. I was just wondering if you are still doing nursing work. It hasn’t been mentioned on the show so I have a feeling not.
Happy Thanksgiving to you both and your families and G
od Bless you. We pray the delivery goes/went as smoothly as possible. Please, I beg you, buckle up when you’re in the car. Wearing seat belts is the law, and seat belts save lives.
Jamie, please don’t call your ex, your best friend, at least not to Doug’s face. I feel you need to step back and have an out of body experience, just to see how much hurt you’re causing him, I mean watching it, we all can see the pain on this guy’s face, and he is such a great guy. Like Dr. Pepper said, think about how certain things would affect your husband before you say it and FORGET YOUR EX! I mean what if Doug had an ex and the roles were reversed, would you accept all that you’re dishing out? Please oh please stop being selfish and hurting this poor man.
You guys were my favorite couple, it was real, the struggle was real. I lived how Doug was so patient with you, just waiting for you to fall in love. You make an awesome couple and when the time is right, I can’t wait to see little Doug and Jamie babies!! I’m not a believer in love at first site, I believe that live grows thru the years of a couple getting to know each other. Good luck to you both, although I believe you already have it.
I hope everything goes well with your sisters delivery it would be awesome to have a Thanksgiving baby that would be a blessing from above, I hope everything is okay with you and Doug you guys are the power couple on the show, I pretty much have given up on love then I see this show and think how crazy it is to be married at first sight, you both have done it I just love you both if I could ever be lucky enough to find a guy as sweet as Doug guys judge girls by there size it hurts soo badly it’s like wear my pain like stilettos as bad as it hurt no you’ll never.. you have it made Jamie you are truly blessed and a inspiration for so many others
Jamie, I have learned a lot about myself simply from you being you 🙂 Often when I found myself criticizing you, I then realized we are actually a lot alike. I think we both see the world through our feelings, which can sometimes cause problems 😉 haha!
I really hated the way you treated your partner on Bachelor Pad, but after getting to know you on MAFS, it is impossible for me NOT to love you now! Even when you are at fault, I see you have a good heart underneath it all, and are quick to apologize once you realize you are in the wrong 🙂 You also light up a room, as you are very personable and a joy to be around. You can make strangers feel like friends, and you’re extremely talented at interviewing. I was shocked watching your reel on youtube… Talk about a natural! 🙂
I do hope you have finally cut off all contact with your ex though! It seems you are having an emotional affair with him in your mind this season. Cling to Doug instead!!! Your husband should be your best friend, not your ex! And they do not need to be friends with each other at all… You are on MAFS, not “Brother Husbands” lol!
Best of luck to you and Doug both 😀 I truly believe you belong together, and I don’t say that about many couples! You two are the perfect balance and so much fun together! It’s also so heartwarming to see your in-laws welcome you and your family with open arms. You really hit the jackpot… The Heners are rare gems, and it’s nice to see you surrounded by so much love <3
Jamie Doll. Be who you are,always. Let Dough love you and always love him back. You are amazing. And bringing up your ex, i have been there. And our love has grown stronger. Yours will too, Im sure. Thank you for letting us watch your life All over the world. Thank you ♡
Dear, Jamie me and my husband been married for 25yrs. We watched mafs. Since it first aired. Only comment I have is why do you bring up your ex. That’s why you call him your ex, you are married now its time to put on your big girl panties and be a wife to your husband. Doing is patient than mist men would be, and remember than grass always seems greener on the other side, but when you get there is very brown! So take care and god bless.
Hello Jamie! I watched you on MAFS and MAFS: The First Year for a while. I’ve seen Instagram posts and have read your blog and am so sad to see people turn their backs on your relationship. I have always rooted for you guys and wish you so much luck. I hope your holidays are filled with so much love and respect. I pray everything works out for you. You deserve so much!
Hope you and your family have a happy Thanksgiving. I pray your sister’s delivery goes as planned and you have a healthy nephew. Growth is hard, I’m seeing that for myself. I am also seeing the Lord’s guidance in the process. Meaning, that it may feel like you have all these things you need to work on to be the wife your husband deserves, the child your parents deserve, the sister your siblings should have, etc, but God will whisper this is the issue at hand here is what I the Lord said about it. Now I don’t know about your faith, I can tell you that listening to the stillness has helped tremendously. Have a wonderful holiday.
I think the insights you are gaining from this process are invaluable! And maybe things you could not have seen any other way… It’s hard to watch for sure… And it’s easy to criticize… There were moments when I wanted to say, what the hell were you thinking… But the struggle is real… And we are all a work in progress… I hope you continue to work on yourself and seek healing for the wounds you carry from your past… That is the thing that will bring you True Peace… No one is easy to live with all the time… But something I have learned over the years is to think about how to say something before just blurting it out and being brutally honest! I have to slow down my reaction and think if it’s really something I need to say, how can I say it in a way my husband is most likely to hear it… And when I have a strong reaction to something I take some time to ask myself why I am reacting so strongly… What is it triggering in me that I need to pay attention to… Journaling can be very helpful w that… Good luck on your journey! I hope you guys are able to find a way thru this part…We all struggle! You are not alone! And neither is Doug! So glad you realized that a baby and a house are not the answers to your problems! Take care!
Wow, saw the mid season finale and woke up and saw all of these ridiculous comments on IG and thought you could use some encouragement. You are blessed, Ms Jamie. I think all of these harsh critics are forgetting that when you signed up for this “love experiment” (which by the way, sounds like the title of a weird movie lol), you two didn’t know it would be marriage! And after that, you still said “yes”! Your desire for real, true, reciprocal love was was strong enough to get you through all of those hard moments. So when people judge, I get irked for you. You are brave, you are strong, you were hopeful enough to imagine a future that involved love, and happiness, and family. We got a glimpse of where you came from and I can see that even that dream is not an easy one to make happen when you’ve been taught all of your life you were undeserving of it. So yes, you’ve got some issues to work on. And you can’t control that. But you can control your attitude about it. So just keep putting on love, every day, and push through. You’ve got this! -Nicole/@OneSarcasticCookie
The fact that you continue to keep up your chirpy entertainment mode ‘my husband is great’ ‘I am learning so much’ this is ‘all normal’ partnership growth communications to the masses speaks volumes as to just how much you are NOT getting it Jamie. All the while slapping on the makeup, posing for the camera, selling your products and trying to convince us all that one way or another you ARE going to live happily ever after. Surprisingly the one thing I do not agree with is the bashing you are taking for bringing up your EX over and over again. Clearly he is a father you never had stand-in and you feel desperate to keep him in your life. The question you want to ask yourself is not why do you keep bringing him up rather why you were having sex with your father/father figure. GET some serious hard core counseling before getting on the baby train.
Dear Jamie,
Thank you for sharing your story. You are very brave and have a kind heart and soul. Don’t be too hard on yourself and just know there are many of us who are supporting you! We have all done crazy things and if were picked up on camera would make us question ourselves. Let it go! Have a wonderful holiday season!
Jamie, Your blog tonight was wonderful. Your insight on things has made me take a look at myself. Never easy to do as you know but sometimes watching someone go though the same kind of problems can open your eyes and make you take a good look at yourself. Thank you for the insight. You may not know it but your honesty and willingness to open up about your marriage will help a lot of folks out there. I know you’ve helped me. Wishing you & Doug the very best. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving. xoxo
Happy for you two. This was a sweet blog. Thanks for sharing as always. Glad this whole experience has allowed you the opportunity to grow on so many different aspects and alongside your husband. I truly wish you both utmost happiness as you continue to grow as individuals and as lovers. best wishes.
Jamie,
Just wanted to give you a thumbs up for being so real on the show. You put yourself out there, knowing you are going to be torn a part by “Team Doug” fans, and you carry on and learn from it! I have no doubt you struggled watching yourself on playback, reliving it all, but good for you for LEARNING from it!!!!! Not many do…… Best wishes to your sister and her new miracle, to you and Doug, and to both your families!!!! Enjoy your Thanksgiving
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Enjoyed the show. How long is it before we can see the rest of the show. The highlight of my Tuesdays is watching the show. Looking forward the the rest for the story. Thank you for sharing. Happy Thanksgiving to you, Doug and family.
Hi Jamie, I have watched and followed you and Doug from your marriage. As weird as that may be. LOL. I admire your relationship mainly because it wasn’t instant physical attraction and lust. Your relationship grew naturally and with time. I unfortunate am in Canada and can not view this current season two of the year after, I have been able to catch a few on youtube. I will admit I have yelled at you at my TV for wanting to buy house/and have baby when you are struggling in your marriage, and with unresolved feelings for your ex. Wrong time yes to bring a baby into the mix. My sister and her husband have been married for 34 years now and still going strong and there most struggles were once they had kids, having different parenting styles etc. So wait and be patient and you will make great babies and life once your relationship gets back on solid ground. The show definitely shines and portrays you in a worse light. Please understand one thing and ex is an ex for a reason and I hope and pray you do not lose Doug in the process. I am 54 and have a failed marriage and many failed relationships under my belt and watching Doug and his shining qualities that is so hard to find in a partner. Strength, patience, loving/caring, sensitive, honesty, faithfulness and he makes you feel beautiful and wanted and needed. Yes, he needs to work on being more open and communication as that is a need in a great marriage. I wish you both all the luck and hope this show is not real time and you have worked through most of these issues and have things back on track. Thanks for reading Emily from Toronto, Ontario Canada
My wife and I enjoy watching Married at First Sight but have come to the conclusion that you might possibly be the most horrible human being on the face of the earth. Nothing you do or say on the show seems real or authentic and you treat your “husband” like trash, you don’t deserve him. Poor guy should run for the hills!!!!
I’ve got another good quote for ya… “We don’t see things as they are, we see things as WE are.” That has helped me grow and try not to put my expectations on other people in relationships. I truly am cheering you and Doug on. Happy holidays! Keep up the honesty!
Jamie I LOVE reading your blog and I am so happy that you and Doug are still married and working on things. I have been married 11 years and we still work on our marriage and continuing to be happily married. I pray for yiu both nightly and I will continue to do so! Best of luck to you both and I cannot wait until I read your next blog post!
Jaime, I have watched you guys from the start and I love the way that you guys are trying to find your way in this marriage. I married my husband after only knowing him for 6 months, and it’s like you don’t really know them then either. I am the first of 5 kids and my parents were married at 15 and 18 and have been together for 54 years. We had love and stability and had absolutely the greatest childhood, my husband is the 5th child and his parents divorced when he was 6 years old. He always looked in control and seemed to be very put together but he hid his insecurities and it led into some really bad behaviors. (control, some physical and emotional abuse) but we have over come most of these issues over the last 30 years but it’s been tough! It’s a road that has been traveled a million times but you must remember that you and Doug are traveling this road for the first time! Its rocky, hilly, scary and unknown but is a road worth taking. Enjoy the sighting seeing and take the time to really talk about thingsbecause once we were able to learn to talk to each other we really were able to get past some of the potholes that we came across and it seemed like lots of things just got better. Good communication and really wanting it to work helped. You are beautiful and really put together on the outside but sometimes we really have to look on the inside and know that we must accept the past, explore the past and then put the past behind you because this road is now being taken by two people and not just one. The very best of luck. Marriage is the hardest thing you will do because it’s not like in the fairy tale books but who would want that, the unknown is what is exciting and the mundane days are needed to rest for the wild ride, just communicate and love and you will make it the best journey and fulfill your destiny as a great wife and the very best MOM!
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Jamie,
I have watched you and Doug since your Wedding Day. Yes, this season has been hard to watch, but it is because I have grown to have such hope and love for you and Doug as a married couple.
This blog was awesome! I too came from a divorced family and a Dad that cheated on every wife he had, and I then dated those same guys, until my Husband. He had grown up with many divorces in his childhood, and not so nice Step-Dads.. We married in July, and I was pregnant by Thanksgiving. My son is a miracle, but we didn’t have time to work out our marriage stuff. I did have Endometrisis, and problems inside my uterus, so I believe God knew my time for having a baby was coming to a close. He is our only. I won’t go into all the rest of the baby stuff.
Yes, your Baby Clock is normal for a woman, especially in your field.
As soon as you relax in your marriage, Doug will too.
Have you thought about going to church? Having a church home, really helped both of us. I could help in areas that fed my heart, and he could do the same. On Sunday’s, while the baby was in the nursery, we would break down and cry during some worship songs, knowing our marriage was sacred, and we had so many flaws, but we had been forgiven by Jesus.
It matters not if you have “Fans”. We live for a short time. It matters how we treat our family, friends, community. I pray you and Doug find a Christian church. I love your story…the story of you and your husband. One more thing! Don’t beat yourself up! You had a tough upbringing. This is an unconventional marriage!! I see you trying. I see that you love your husband and his family. Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!! I hope your sister has her baby soon! Focus on the simple things. New York may not be the best place to live right now anyway! Crazy people in the world. Take care of yourself and Doug. Its about thd two of you. After 10 years of marriage, and always dealing with everyone’s drama, I get it now.
You are so much wiser than I am!!!!!!!! Relax, and enjoy this time alone with your hubby! Plan a sexy trip!! Do something fun, (not on his crazy list), that would bring you closer!! I am so sincere in my prayers and blessings for you and Doug and your future beautiful family. Blessings, Meeghan
I also agree with getting involved in a good church. I am praying for you also.
thanks so much! 🙂
I think I can stop trying to tell you what to do (in my mind); you’re clearly capable of figuring things out!
Olá Jamie, sou do Brasil e estou sempre lendo seu blog, fico muito feliz por vcs e torço muito… bjs
My husband and I have known each other and dated since we were 15! Listen, the struggle is real! We aren’t perfect, and women want what they want! In the heat of the moment it doesn’t feel like we are being harsh or selfish. Hang in there! I’m sure this is hard to watch back, there are some cringe worthy moments, but that’s life! Nobody is perfect! I wish the best for you two! Doug isn’t perfect, your not perfect, but if you were how boring would that be!
I appreciate your honesty because obviously it would have been easier to fake a fairytale but that’s not real life. I have had abandonment issues and identify with you in many ways. You and Doug are on a journey – thanks for sharing it with us.
Let me just say I know exactly how you feel. Letting people into my life and being intimate with my husband is so hard to come by for me
Sometimes I am my worse enemy. I try so hard to protect myself from getting hurt I hurt people in the process. Take that leap of faith. Because in the end you are just getting by and not truly living.. take care
You are not perfect, but who is? It is sometimes very hard to watch you & Doug. I have had my doubts. Doug is not perfect either (who is?), but he appears to be a good man and it is easy to see that his parents have set a good example. IF you 2 can get through the hard times, it think it will be worth it. There is nothing better than growing old with your best friend, all because we made it through the hard times.
I know weve spoke back and fourth a couple times on social media, but i follow you on just about everything because i admire you in so many ways. Im so proud of you. All of you.. The good, the bad, and the ugly. Youve grown so much Jamie and for that alone, you should be so proud. Just know by you being you, you have changed lives everywhere by being genuine and honest. I hope you, Doug, and Lady girl have a beautiful blessed Thanksgiving.
Hi Jamie! I have watch the journey that you and Doug have been on since day one and I have to say that I find it incredibly brave of you to watch your relationship play out on TV especially the low moments that we’ve seen in the past few episodes. However, I agree that this is the way that you’ll both be able to grow as individuals and as a couple. From what I’ve seen and read from Doug I think that he is an incredible man who truly loves you with all of his heart and is committed to making your marriage work. Having unresolved feelings for your ex must be hard, especially when you didn’t have much time to sort out those feelings before you said I do. To me, it seemed as though you were looking for reason to validate your feelings for your ex. Doug wants a family (eventually), but your ex didn’t. So if Doug is in anyway wavering on that family, maybe that’s your “get out of jail free” card so to speak with your feelings with your ex. I think that you have an incredible man and I think that you need to let him love you. I know that sounds crazy but you seem to be self sabotaging the relationship at least at this point. I will be 35 next month and believe me, I know baby fever. But we both need to just take a breath and enjoy what life is right now and not be so impatient for our future. I admire Doug for supporting you through this but also understand that he is just trying to ensure a strong foundation before building your family. Love to you, Doug and both of your families. I hope that you have a wonderful Thanksgiving and get to squeeze your baby niece soon. ❤️
Hi Jamie, can you pleaseee post the link to you periscopes on Twitter?!?!
I’M ROOTING FOR YOU AND DOUG…THE FIRST COUPLE YEARS ARE ALWAYS TOUGH AND CHALLENGING, AND EVEN TOUGHER FOR YOU, CAUSE YOU WERE STRANGERS…..HERE’S THE THING I PICKED UP ON….I HEARD YOU SAY ON ONE OF THE EPISODES, THE REASON YOU BROKE UP WITH THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE WAS B/C HE WAS OLDER AND DIDN;T WANT MORE CHILDREN. I THINK YOU THOUGHT THAT (LIKE YOU) DOUG WOULD WELCOME KIDS RIGHT AWAY….AND WHEN YOU FOUND OUT HOW HE FELT…YOU WERE DISSAPOINTED AND STARTING RESENTING HIM. IT’S JUST MY THOUGHT…I COULD BE DEAD WRONG.
ONE OTHER THING…DOUG IS SUCH A GOOD LOOKING GUY AND HE’S SEXY….BUT IF HE WOULD GET THE MOLES REMOVED FROM HIS FACE HE WOULD LOOK SO MUCH BETTER.
T
Jamie gal don’t give up…I met my hubs on eHarmony no lie (7th match at that and 6 mos after meeting he moved and had spinal fusion) so I know all about real struggle! But you’re both perfect for the other and you’re both continuing to enrich each other! Trust you’ll have a full family; but, have the time 2 people should to enjoy each other before having to sacrifice all for that little ones first…just look how long it took to find Doug. Doug just wants to spend time with you, treat and enjoy all you both deserve! Tge best part of Doug look how he treated you & waited & earned your trust & love. Likewise you also grew as much and more now! The best part of maturing in your marriage is becoming better in each others lives & taking the journey together never leaving anyone steps behind. Now I don’t know either of you; but, I know the show is edited and that I’m trusting your love for each other is genuine & unwavering believing if truth is key you’ll both have a lovestory to stand time, storms, and pain but cone out stronger & more beautiful that can be imagined! My hubs is 52 after 3 hernia, 6 knee operations, 2 back spinal fusions, and a neck fusion from a car accident in 2009 we can over come surely you 2 will surpass us! Oh my hubs is also ADHD…and more medical issues but I ever the optimist and happy much like you ready to go always…manage. struggle is real, marriage is a business…but noone ever says it like it’s taboo if told. So like a business partners have to be invested and get dirty doing the work 24x7x365…no days off and not the fairy tale or soap opera … real work…real struggle but overwhelmingly consumingly never full wanting more so worth it! Love to talk more so much to share and support! Let me know! Jamie good comes with bad and like life it’s ever evolving but tomorrow is always a new gift! You’re doing great, let yourself grow and Doug too…but remember why you both said I do, never look back keeping up and forward. Both my hubs and I root for you both, solely because the guy next door/prince met his pretty woman & i know his love will be forever just keep working at it ( I did with mine)!
Hey girl! First of all Doug and I went to school together so seeing him and you going through this has been so sweet! As in any relationship there are ups and downs. My husband and I met online and shortly after we got married and the nex thing I knew I was pregnant. Not planned but we embraced it. It’s been rough living life and navigating the ups and downs of marriage along with raising a child. If you ever need a friend I’m here. Happy Thanksgiving and good luck to your sister!
I became aware of you guys when my daughter who worked at Starbucks told me you and Doug came in all the time. I was curious to watch a Sayreville couple on reality tv! I’m sorry you feel alone in the town. I’ve lived here for 22 years and raised my kids here. My daughter even volunteers at Sammys Hope! Anyway I wanted you to know there are lots of great people in town and I really hope things work out for the two of you! It can’t be easy. Thank you for showing your honest struggles. I look forward to seeing you both grow!
Happy Thanksgiving! My little girl (lol) turns 23 tomorrow so that’s a great birthday for the new little baby in the family. Praying for easy, healthy labor for your sister. It’s a beautiful thing. Love you guys 🙂
I have been rooting for you Two since day one! I saw something in each of you that the other needs. Marriage is hardwork (been married 24 years myself) but with love, caring, communication, patience and understanding you can get through anything together if you want to. Don’t take each other for granted. Best of luck to you two!
I wish you, Doug and your families a VERY HAPPY THANKSGIVING!! Thank you for sharing your lives with us!! I am in awe of you and Doug!! You both are open, honest and loving!! I am rooting for you two and I wish you nothing but love & happiness!!! Hope you are an Aunt again as you read this!! Best of luck to your sister with her delivery!! Much Love….Cheryl
Props to you for admitting your faults and learning from them. You are a great person. Don’t ever forget that. I love you and Doug as a couple because you are REAL and have real life problems. You both are such an inspiration to the rest of the world on how to work for love. You’ve shown that it’s not all easy. It’s work and requires maintenance. I wish the best of luck to both of you. Thanks for sharing your lives with us, you’ve helped people dealing with struggles in relationships – myself being one of them! ❤️
You have such a good heart Jamie!
Hi Jamie, I’ve been watching you and Doug’s journey since the first hello. Thanks for keeping it real, that really takes integrity and courage! I have loads of respect for you both. Wishing you both every success. Happy and healthy holidays! : )
Honoring your true authentic self is the most important thing; even if its not “popular”. Its really easy to get bogged down on yourself, and I can’t imagine it being reflected back on a TV show plus with folks constantly giving you their opinions, but you know whats best for you and for Doug and your relationship. You guys will make it. You have a beautiful bond in both love and friendship, so trust that. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving and hold those dear to you close! Its a crazy world out there!
I for one have been glad to see the honesty in this season. It’s so easy for people to be fake or just give a good “show” for a reality show instead of being real and vulnerable. Kudos to you and Doug. Can’t imagine doing it knowing so many will critique and criticize. All that to say, keep choosing each other. Even when you don’t feel like it. Marriage is often just a choice, not a feeling. Happy Thanksgiving!
You live and learn- I’ve enjoyed following ya’ll’s journey. You both seem like genuine people, good people that do actually have complimenting personalities. No one is perfect and no relationship is perfect but it is what you make of it with the raw materials. Ya’ll have what it takes. I see a house and kids in ya’ll’s future – after ya’ll are secure in each other. Funny thing is- once that happens, the urgency of having it all- right now- seems to not be so urgent anymore. Then it’s okay to plan Ya’ll have a wonderful Thanksgiving, enjoy the fam and food.
Jamie, I hope you truly see the progress you made since this began! What an amazing transformation you have been going through. My heart swells and hurts for you (and Doug) and I yell at ya and cheer for you through the screen (you hear it, right?) So much love for you two and hope you continue the effort to have an amazing marriage. The work is truly worth it, don’t ya think!?
Lots of love from me in little Vancouver Wa!
Danielle
Please remember that flaws are the things that make us unique and totally lovable! Flaws are beautiful, and having a man who accepts you for those flaws and loves you because of them is the best gift in the world. I find in my own (flawed) relationship that the best thing for a relationship is to have fun. Find fun in weird ways and enjoy each other! Thank you for being so honest; it helps me in my own struggles!
I once heard a quote that said something along the lines of, “most of the time, we don’t see our own flaws until they are pointed out to us.” Never easy to see ourselves that way. Although, I believe when we see that we ourselves is imperfect, we tend to be less harsh on others, because we are working on ourselves instead of others. But, I hope you two are on the road to eternal bliss! Happy Thanksgiving! Grateful hearts, are happy hearts! Best wishes to your sis:)
Happy Thanksgiving to you, too! Thank you for sharing that quote with me. I like it. 🙂